The Impossible Miracle
by AlwaysAndForever13
Summary: Takes place in NM. Edward leaves Bella promising her there will be no trace of him. What happens when he can't keep his promise because he doesn't know she's pregnant? Will he ever come back, or will she have to raise a child by herself?
1. Meeting Fate

A/N: Here is a better understanding…

Takes place in New Moon, duh. Edward has been gone for about a month or so. Jacob and Bella are every good friends. Jacob knows all about the Cullens being vampires. Bella doesn't really talk to anyone else in her school except for Angela and Ben. And basically everything else is the same… Oh and this story will pretty much follow the book except for a few things.

I don't own anything! It sucks, doesn't it?

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I was laying on my bed staring at the ceiling. I was playing everything over in my head for the hundredth time. Edward leaving. Edward telling me he doesn't care about me anymore. It all happened too fast. One minute he loved me the next… not. I couldn't get over this feeling I had that it had something to do with that night.

It was about a month ago when Edward let _me_ be in control of us for a change and it just sort of happened. Then my birthday just had to happen. Everything went downhill from there.

_Oh crap._ I got up and ran to the bathroom. I dropped to my knees as I threw up everything I have eaten today, which wasn't that much to begin with. Ugh I felt like this for a week now and at first I thought it was a flu or something, but now I'm not sure.

"Bella, are you okay in there?" Charlie asked knocking on the door.

I splashed my face with cold water. "Yea dad, I'm okay." Wait, no, no I'm good.

"Okay, well I have to go. Have a good day!"

Right, like that will happen at this rate. After I heard the door close I got out and changed my clothes. I need to get out, like badly. So, I got into my truck and drove away from that house.

I actually ended up driving to La Push to see Jacob. I don't even know why though. When I got out of my truck he seemed to see me because he jumped up and ran over to me. Then he just had to pick me up.

"Bella, what are you doing here?" he asked spinning me around.

"Well, I'm going to be sick," I said as he sat me down. "Anyways I really just need to be somewhere other than my house. I can't be that alone with my thoughts anymore."

He nodded. "Are you okay? You look kind of pale."

I waved him off. "I'm fine. I just haven't been myself lately."

"Because of _him_ right?"

My instinct told me to protect myself, so I wrapped my arms around myself. Jacob sighed, putting his arm around my shoulders as he led me into his house.

"Bella," Billy said looking up from his newspaper, "it's nice to see you again."

"It's nice to see you too Billy."

"Dad, I'm going to show Bella the Rabbit," Jacob said as he showed me the way to his garage.

When we got there he got me a seat and told me to sit. I knew he was going to talk to me about something. "Bella, I think you should see a doctor. You've been pale for weeks now, and I always hear Billy talk with Charlie about you. I mean Charlie said you have been throwing up every morning for weeks now."

"Jake, I'm scared too."

He squeezed my knee. "Why would you be scared to see a doctor?"

When he said doctor something clicked in my head. I knew it couldn't happen though. _He_ told me it couldn't happen. Maybe he was wrong though. I mean I don't think any other vampire has been with a human before… "I don't want to know the truth," I whispered.

"You're going to find out sometime soon. You have to know, but what don't you want to know Bella?"

I swallowed. "I think I might be… but I can't be. _He_ told me it was next to impossible. But Jacob, what if I am? What will I do?"

He stared at me like I was speaking another language. "Bella, what are you talking about?"

I stared at the oil spill on the floor of the garage. "I need to see a doctor." I had to know.

He nodded and got up to make an appointment to tomorrow at noon. I left soon after that. I had to think about what would happen if it was true. What would I do? Would I try to find the Cullens to tell them? No, I wouldn't. They wouldn't have left if they cared about me. They would have known if it was true. Even if _he_ didn't love me anymore _he_ wouldn't have let me. Would he?

I came home to the smell of pizza. Ugh just the smell was making me sick. Charlie was asleep on the couch, meaning I could get upstairs without having to eat that.

I got up to my room and clasped onto my bed. I grabbed my iPod off the floor and put it on shuffle. The first song to come on was _Dark Blue_ by Jack's Mannequin. I quickly changed it knowing _he_ loved me in that color. The next song was _Secret Valentine_ by We The Kings. I kept it on. I groaned sitting up on my bed. I put my elbow on my window seal and looked out into the rain.

Tears started coming down my eyes along with the rain. I didn't understand how _he_ could just leave me. I don't understand how any of them could leave me. Clearly they are better liars than they lead on.

I fell back onto my bed and let the music lead me into a smooth sleep.

I was suddenly in the clearing. Only this time I was by myself. I looked around and imagined the people who were here last. Emmett was batting, Alice was catching, Carlisle was in the field and so was Edward. Rosalie was waiting for her turn at bat and Esme was beside me. Only none of them were here. Suddenly I saw James, Victoria and Laurent. Only one wasn't there.

I looked down; my stomach was three times its normal size! My eyes went wide as I gulped. Victoria and Laurent swiftly came to my side. Laurent hit me to the ground. Victoria crouched beside me and took a slow bit at my neck…

I suddenly woke up screaming and sweating. I looked at my clock. It was 1:14 AM. I pulled my covers off and looked at my stomach. Just as I thought it should be, flat and normal.

What a nightmare. Maybe I should eat cheddar chips before bed. Hopefully that's what made my nightmares. Hopefully.

"Bella," Jacob called walking into my house at 11:30, "are you almost ready?"

No, I wanted to scream, but I couldn't because my head was practically in the toilet. When I could finally breathe again I told him yes. Then I got ready and headed down to meet my fate.

On the way there I would only look out the rainy window. All I could think of was _them_. Wouldn't they know if it was true? Did they really not care about me? Though seriously, who could be that cold hearted? Well, they don't have a heartbeat. . .

I looked over to Jacob who quickly flashed me a smile before I turned back to the window. _Drip, drip, drip._ Ugh could this ride be any longer? I hate being this alone with my thoughts. I couldn't deal with all of my memories.

The freshest one had to about a month ago before my birthday. We were laying in my bed after _it_ happened. He was holding me next to his cold body, but I felt strangely warm. The clearest part of that night is what he whispered to me.

"_Bella, marry me," he whispered in my ear._

_I propped up on my elbows and stared at him. "Edward be serious."_

"_You're wounding my ego, love. I am completely serious."_

_I sighed and brushed my fingers across his cheek. "I… can't. I'm only eighteen. We aren't even close to being done with high school. I'm just not ready for that."_

"_Well I've been in high school five, six times now," he said giving a faint smile. "Bella, we don't have to get married tomorrow. We can wait a year. I just want you to know how much I love you."_

"_A ring can't show me what I already know. Besides if we aren't getting married right away then why can't we wait for the whole engagement thing?"_

_He looked down and smiled sadly. "You don't want to get married do you?"_

_I laid back and thought about it. Right now I really didn't, but in a few years I would. "Edward, I would love to be your wife, but my mom always told me to wait until I was older. It's sort of stuck in my head that I should wait."_

"_It's okay, love. I understand where you are coming from. One day, though, you will be wearing my ring on your finger," he said with a teasing smile._

I should have just said yes. That could have been the reason he left me. Maybe he just doesn't take rejection that well. But he was completely normal the next day and was smiling more than ever. I would always have that question in my head now. What if I said yes? Would he still be here? Would he be driving me to the doctors instead of Jacob, or would he still abandon me?

"Bella, we're here," Jacob said getting out of the truck.

I got out, slowly. I was still dizzy from that morning sickness. I did, however, make it up to the second floor without getting sick. What an accomplishment.

We waited for an hour before they finally called me back to a room. "Hello, my name is Jane Green. You must be Isabella Swan," a nurse said dressed in purple scrubs. She had curly blond hair, blue eyes, and was maybe 5 feet, 7 inches.

"Bella," I corrected.

"Okay _Bella_, what seems to be the problem?"

"I don't know, well I may know. I've been throwing up every morning. I can't seem to eat anything, but cheddar chips. Everything else makes me sick."

She nodded writing it all down on a chart. "Okay Bella, it seems like you might be pregnant. I'm going to run some blood work so we are positive. Would you like someone to get the father?"

_Yes, please._ "No, he's not in the picture."

"Isn't he in the waiting room?"

_I wish_. "No he's just a friend, and he can wait out there."

She nodded and did everything she had too afterwards she came back to talk to me about the whole 'father' thing. "Bella, does the guy know he may be a father?" I shook my head. "Do you think you will tell him?"

"No, he's not in the area anymore. He moved about a month ago. I haven't heard from him since."

"I think you should probably contact him, or a member of his family. One, he does have a right to know. Two, it's hard to do this whole process without the father of the child. I think it would be easier. Would he be violent if he found out? Is that why you won't tell him?"

"No, that's not it. He was so kind and very protective of me," I said quietly. _He was a vampire though. What do you think of that Jane?_

"Can you give me some background on him?"

"Well he was adopted when he was… eight. He has two other adopted brothers and two adopted sisters. His 'father' is a doctor. Um, he has brown hair?"

"Who was his father?" Jane asked eying me.

"Dr. Carlisle Cullens," I said quickly.

Her eyes went wide. "You're kidding me. I used to work with him. If you want I could give you the number of the hospital he is working at now. It's somewhere in New Hampshire."

I shook my head. "No, no. Please don't call him and tell him. He either wouldn't believe you, or come back here. I just don't want them to be involved at this point. Not just because I might be pregnant, but I would want them to want to come back just because it's me."

She nodded. "Which one of his sons might be the father?"

"Edward Cullens," I choked out. I hated saying his name.

"Nice. He's definitely one of the cuter ones."

I almost laughed at that. Emmett would have a fit if Edward beat him in that. Jane left me to go and find out what's wrong with me after that. I thought I would be alone for awhile, but then Jacob came in.

"Do they know anything yet?" he asked peaking his head in.

"No, nothing yet. Come in Jake. I could really use you right now."

He nodded and came in. He jumped onto the table with me and rubbed my back. "Bella, whatever happens I want you to know I will be here for you. I'll even tell Charlie for you."

I forced a laugh out of me. "No, I should tell him if I have a deadly disease or if I'm pregnant. Thanks a lot though."

"Anytime. Now are you sure that you could be pregnant. I thought bloodsuckers couldn't reproduce."

I shrugged. "I didn't think they could, but who knows. I mean I don't know of another human who would even come close to a vampire let alone be with one… alone."

"True. I mean you're the only one crazy enough to fall in love with one. Let alone be best friends with another," he said nudging me.

I faked a smile at him. I just couldn't bring it in my heart to be happy again. "What will I do Jake?"

"You'll go through this whole pregnancy thing and I'll be right there with you. The whole time. I'll put up with your weird cravings and mood swings. Then when it's all done you will raise a beautiful baby that will hopefully never ever meet another mythological creature. And if you need me, I'll help you make sure he or she doesn't fall in love with one."

I put on my head on his shoulder. "What would I do without you Jake?"

"Well, you would be wishing I was here with you."

I nudged him a little and he laughed. I could barely move him. Jane came in at that point. "Hello, you must be the friend…?"

"Jacob Black. I'll be here with Bella every step of the way," he said shaking Jane's hand.

"Well, that's good. It would be very hard for Bella to go through a life changing process by herself. Anyways, I have the results," she said taking out the chart. "Bella, you are pregnant."

I felt like I was going to pass out. Jacob grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I held it so tight I thought I might break his hand.

"Now there are options."

"Options?" I asked.

"Yes, like say you didn't want to keep it. You could give it up for adoption or there is always abortion," she said looking down at her charts again.

"Um, well, the second option is out." She nodded. "I'll consider the first," I said quietly. I mean if I put it up for adoption then it could have a mother and a father. Also it would have a better chance of not being in contact with vampires or whatever else is out there.

"We'll think about it," Jacob said.

It didn't sound like he wanted that option at all either. I shrugged it off though. I mean I was going through this 'process'. I should get to decide if I want it to have a shot at having a normal life, or a 15 of a chance to have a normal life. I was sort of leaning towards the 75 chance instead of the 15 chance…

When we got to the car Jacob looked at me. "What?" I asked.

"You can't give it up for adoption."

"Why not?"

"Bella, this has probably never happened before. What if it becomes a vampire sometime in life and kills its adopted parents. No, you have to take care of it. You'll know what to do if that does happen. Besides I know you are going to be a great mother."

"Jacob, what if that doesn't happen though. This child could have an actual normal life! I don't want to take it away from that."

"We can't take the chance though. I mean who knows what will happen? I know I don't want to take the chance. It's too big of a chance. It's your decision though, you chose," he said starting the car.

I was my decision. Which one is the right one though? Is it like a trick question, or a gamble with fate? This child might have a 50/50 chance of being normal or become a vampire sometime in its life. What if it is normal though? I'll have to tell it sometime what its father is, and then it will be terrified of everyone. If it's not, however, then it will be a good thing I kept it.

Should I take the chance or be safe?

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A/N: Well there is the first chapter. Tell me if I should keep going or if I should just stop now. If you like it, though, tell me what you think the sex of the baby should be! Also if you would like a chapter or two in Edward's POV…


	2. Blocked Visions

A/N: Thanks for the reviews and alerts last chapter. It's always fun reading what you have to say. Well I hope you enjoy this next chapter too!

I still don't own anything.

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**Edward's POV**

_Edward,_ Alice thought,_ we're going to go to school. Are you coming with us today, or are you going to stay home again? I think you should come and clear your mind._

I got up off my spot at the windowsill and made my way to Rosalie's Porsche. In the driveway I looked at my Volvo and sighed. I haven't been in that car since I left_ her_. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice. Right now I don't think I did.

School was probably the worst place to come and clear my mind. It reminded me of when I first laid my eyes on _my_ Bella. Her questionable eyes and her blocked mind. Also since I never had to pay attention in class all the thoughts of unknowing children rushed into my head.

_That new boy, Edward, is so hot! I wonder if he had a girlfriend where he used to live. He seems sad at points, he must have. She probably did something stupid to drive him away, _a girl, Erin Leaver, thought.

I wanted to growl at her, but I didn't trust myself to do it low enough. How dare she think of _my_ Bella that way? She didn't even know her and yet she is judging her. Besides it's my own fault I'm sad. I left her when I wish I didn't have to.

At lunch Alice clunked her tray down beside me. Her eyes were worried and frustrated. _I know you told me not to try and see Bella's future now that we left her, but something important leaked threw_, Alice thought.

"What?" I asked in an urgent, low voice.

_That's the thing, I don't know. She was in a doctor's room, but then her future just disappeared. I don't know what happened. All I saw was her sitting there in a gown. She seemed like she was waiting for someone,_ she thought looking down at her food.

I looked at her questioning her mind's eye. How could someone's future just disappear? Wait why would Bella even be in a doctor's office? What could possibly be wrong with her?

"Alice, do you have any idea what could have been wrong with her," I asked so only she could hear me.

She shook her head. _No, not at all._

When we got home I did what I always do now. Went to my room and never came out. I went to my favorite spot, the windowsill. I sat down and thought of a way I could protect Bella without being by here, and putting her in danger.

I had to leave and track Victoria. I was the only way I could make sure Bella was never harmed by my kind again. But if I were to track her I would have to start in Forks again. If I went back to Forks I don't think I could leave her again, but she wouldn't know it. Maybe if I did go there I could find out 

what was wrong with her. If it was serious I would stay, if not I would just pretend I was never there. That way I wouldn't ruin her life.

How could I just leave my family? They had been supportive this whole time and many of them, mostly Rosalie, thought it was for the best that we leave Bella behind so she never has to deal with vampires again. What if I stayed? Would they want to come back too? Would Carlisle want to leave his new job?

I walked over to the piano I got in my room. I sat down on the piano stool and looked down on the keys, but I couldn't bring myself to play anything. It all reminded me of _her_. She bewitched me. I could never love anyone else, but she doesn't know that. She thinks I don't care about her. When all I was trying to do was make sure she was safe and away from death.

It felt like I left her years ago, when it was only two month ago. My days have been going to long that I can't keep track of when one day ends and the next begins. They all seem to mash together. When I was with _her_ everyday seemed to go by too quickly for me.

It all brought me back to the night we were _together_ for the first time. I will never forget it throughout the core of my existence. I didn't care that she didn't accept my proposal because I thought one day I would get my ring on her finger, but then her birthday happened. I couldn't keep putting her in that danger every time she came to my house. So, I had to do what I did.

I had to lie to her and tell her I no longer loved her, which it was the opposite. Also I had to tell her I no longer cared about her, when it wasn't even close to what I was doing. I had to protect her by leaving. I can't believe I did leave her though. My kind loves like no other, meaning I could never love another like I love her.

I walked downstairs hoping no one would see my, but Alice was standing there waiting for me. "You're leaving, again. This time for the opposite reason, right?"

I looked down not wanting to meet her demanding eyes. "Yes, Alice, I have too. I have to make sure she is safe from our kind. Otherwise she will probably be killed and I can't have that happen. You know I couldn't live with myself if that happened."

"Then why did we leave her Edward? If you want her safe then why aren't you there keeping her safe?"

"You know why. I could have something like the accident at her party happen again. For all we know if Emmett wasn't so strong Jasper might have killed Bella that day. I couldn't let that happen again."

"But Jasper didn't kill her, did he? She's still alive and moving. We kept her safe from that," she said stepping closer to me, challenging me.

"Yes, but we put her in that danger. We saved her from ourselves. We put her in that dangerous position and I don't want to do it again," I snapped back.

"Will you come back?"

"If I kill Victoria I will, but if I don't then I won't rest until I do kill her. I have to go back to Forks though. I have to retrace her steps so I can get her. You'll have to call me if you see anything that could be useful to me," I said making my way to the door.

"I will," she said as I closed the door. She would have to tell the family I left, and she knew that.

When I got off the plane I looked around me. I felt home here. Probably because my love was here in this gray place. I needed to find her, but I had to find Victoria first. I couldn't let her kill _my _Bella. I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

I went to the forest behind _her_ house, hoping I would catch a glimpse of her before I went to search for Victoria. When I walked around to where her window was, I saw it closed. My heart sank. She really did believe me, didn't she? She believed I no longer loved her. Did she not believe me every time I told her I was in love with her?

Suddenly I saw a dark figure in her room. The light came on and there she was. _My _Bella was in there taking something out of her pocket and looking at it on her bed. I couldn't tell what it was, however, I was too far away. Oh how I wanted to get close enough to see, but I couldn't without her noticing me.

I almost didn't notice I was out in the open when she turned around and looked out her window. I quickly ducked behind the trees so she wouldn't know I was here. I had to leave and I knew that. I just couldn't find myself pulling away from her again. I ran as fast as I could away from her so I wouldn't have time to think.

I went by the reservation for some reason and found Victoria's scent there! It amazed me how fresh it was. I had to get her before she came close to _my_ Bella. I followed it back to Bella's house, I could tell it was going to south, but I stopped quickly before I left again.

She was now outside in the grass. I stayed hidden, but something weird happened. When the wind picked up I smelled my own scent coming off of _her_. How could that be when it has been two months since I have seen her last time I touched her? She had own a new sweat shirt so my scent couldn't be on that. It was faint, but strong enough for me to pick up. How could this be?

Another gust of wind came and I knew I had to get to Victoria before she got to Bella, so I ran away thinking of what this could possible mean. What if she was… no that's not an option. Not even a thought because I know that can't happen. Carlisle said it couldn't happen. That still doesn't explain why she still smelled like me.

I decided I would track down Victoria as much as I could and then I would go back to Carlisle and ask him how this could be. I think tracking Victoria would take up to a month or so, meaning I could quickly go back to Bella and see if my scent was still on here. If it was I would go to Carlisle and ask him if this could happen, and ask Alice if she sees anything like that.

When I got down to Houston, Texas, Victoria's trail seemed to split. It seemed to be going to Mexico or over to Oklahoma. I decided to go to Mexico because it seemed like she would try to circle around and then just go the way she was planning. Besides the Mexico trail seemed to be fresher then the Oklahoma trial.

As I ran I thought about what Alice might have seen in her vision if what I thought is true. Maybe she saw the doctor coming in with a chart to tell her what's the matter, but that still doesn't explain how it just disappeared. What creature could have done that? Did another vampire block Bella so Alice couldn't see? No, because there weren't any other vampire scents around Bella, and I know Victoria can't do that. Could werewolves do that? I mean I know there are werewolves in Forks because I was there when we did the treaty, but did Bella know there were any? Besides who would she hang out 

with that was a werewolf? Also what werewolf would hang out with a human when they know that they phase when they are angry or frustrated. That tends to happen a lot with werewolves.

How could Alice's visions just start to fail her when it came to Bella? It never happened before, and it wasn't blocked from me because she knew I was leaving to track Victoria. Ugh, this was so frustrating. Why would it happen when something important happened to Bella?

I shouldn't have left her, and I knew that. Now that I did, however, I don't think she would want me back considering she believed me when I told her I no longer cared about her. I still couldn't get over the fact that she believed me that easily. I mean I knew she trusted anyone who she cared about, but she is so stubborn. I thought that would make her try to convince me I still did love her, which I did. It just didn't seem right.

When I was in Mexico City my cell phone started vibrating. I quickly reached in my pocket to answer it. "Hello?"

"Edward, it's me," Alice said. "I just got another vision about Bella."

"Alice I told you to stop seeing her future. I can't deal with it anymore."

"I know you told me, but I thought maybe something just happened and that's why it disappeared. So, I started getting another vision of her showing something to someone, but then it disappeared again. Edward is there something wrong with me?"

I sighed looking at the desert in front of me. "Alice I would have no idea. You would have to ask Carlisle. Tell me if he figures it out, and do you have any idea what she was showing someone?"

"I think it was a picture of some kind, but I couldn't get a clear enough picture," Alice said.

"Do you know who she was showing the picture too?"

"No I have no idea. The vision went blank right before that. She was saying 'Here I thought you might like to see the picture of my…' and then it went blank. I couldn't tell you what she might be saying."

"Okay, call me if you figure out why this is happening to you," I said hanging up the phone.

What would she being showing someone? See the picture of my what? What could it be? Ugh, I hate this. I couldn't even read her mind when I was there to know what was happening to her. The one time in the world where I really needed to read her mind I couldn't.

When I finally got to South America, I lost the trail. I stayed there for a month searching for it so I could track her again. I hadn't heard from Alice since I was in Mexico. I wonder if she just couldn't tell me why, or she didn't know yet. I kept try to go throw the days, but every day got harder.

I would hunt at night only, and in the days I would try and find Victoria's trial. Every time I actually stopped doing something, I just want to die, or run off a cliff. Something that could be painful, so I would forget what I did to _my _Bella. So, I could forget her face when I left her. That was the only picture of her I could remember. It was forever imprinted in my head. Every time I closed my eyes her hurt face would pop up.

I couldn't remember her smile, or her warm chocolate brown eyes. I only remembered the hurt and confused eyes and frowning lips. I couldn't remember her laugh, only her tears coming down her face. I couldn't remember warmth or even her beating heart. I could only remember the last thing I saw. It was a picture I don't think I could live with for the rest of eternity. I don't think I could kill myself though. Carlisle said everything is impossible. Unless…

Unless I went to the Volturi's and asked them to kill me. If they said no, which I assuming they would, then maybe I could just provoke them so they would have to kill me. I could someone expose our kind in their city. That could work…

I couldn't just kill myself though. What if I just waited until Bella died and I would just go straight after her. I mean it's hard enough not being with her while she's in the world. It will probably be harder knowing she's dead and you couldn't be there with her when she died. That would be unbearable.

So it's decided I'll just go to the Volturi's whenever Bella's time comes and she dies. That way I wouldn't have to deal with this memory for the rest of eternity. It wouldn't be easy to tell my family my plan though, but they all have someone who will live with them for forever and they won't leave them. They don't know what I'm going through. Well Jasper might because he can feel my emotions, but he doesn't know it firsthand.

I've decided so my family will just have to deal with my decision. Maybe one day they will accept what I will do. Besides I hate making the whole family feel down and depressed just because I am. I hate letting them see my like this, all depressed and hopeless. Who knew a helpless human could do this to a powerful vampire.

My cellphone started to vibrate again. "Alice?"

"Edward, Carlisle has an idea of why my visions aren't working," she said quickly. Almost hard for a vampire to catch.

"Which is?" I asked impatiently.

"Either there is another vampire there blocking them from me, werewolves are there, or since I'm no longer in tune with her she is blocking me like she is blocking you mind."

"The first one's out because there were no vampire trails when I went there-"

"You were in Forks?!" Alice nearly screamed in the phone.

"Alice, I had to go back. It was the only place where I could find Victoria's trail without searching all over America. I went by her house to see if there was a trial there and there wasn't one for Victoria or another vampire."

"Okay, but you should have told someone that that was where you were going to track her."

"I was only there for an hour or so. The third one is probably your best bet. I don't think werewolves would go around a human. They tend to stay next to their own kind like us."

"I guess you right," she said taking a deep sigh. "I just hate being blind like this."

"I know you do Alice, but there isn't anything we can do about it. You'll just have to block her out of your mind completely," I said trying to sooth her. This would be hard for her.

"Edward, I don't want too. I miss her, and I know you do it. It's obvious."

"I do miss her Alice. More than anyone will know, but I can't put her in danger. It's too hard for me to deal with."

"I know. I'm not going to like blocking her out of my head."

"I know you won't, but you're going to have to if you want these half visions to stop happening," I said hanging up the phone again. I couldn't deal with talking about Bella out loud anymore. My none beating heart couldn't take it.

I think I should go back to Forks and retrace my steps. I won't let Victoria get to _my_ Bella. As I ran I thought about what Alice told me. I knew that everyone in my family knew that I missed Bella. I don't think I missed human life as much as I missed Bella. Besides I never hid that I missed her.

It would probably take a day or so to get back to Forks. I will probably need to stop and hunt so two days top. Hopefully nothing big will happen in that time. If something did I don't know if I could live with myself.

I stopped in Park City, Utah so I could hunt. I took off my jacket which had my phone in it and left. I had to clear some of my thoughts. As I looked through the forest I spotted a fox and its family. I almost pounced, but when I saw the mother and father push their offspring into a hole I couldn't bring myself to harm them. That's what I wanted, not with foxes, but with Bella. I wanted a family. I didn't just want us to be together, I wanted a baby to go along. That could never happen, however, because my kind cannot reproduce. Otherwise there would be ten little Emmett's and Rosalie's running around.

I started wondering around the forest watching some skiers go down a mountain. Two out of five fell half way down and tumbled the rest of the way down. I felt bad for them, but they reminded me of _my_ Bella. How clumsy she always was. I would never trust her going down a mountain on skis. She wouldn't even make it ¾ of the way down before falling down. I laughed at the thought.

It was the only happy memory of her I could muster up. The others are all tainted by her hurt face. Why did I leave her again? Oh to keep her safe. Sometimes I don't believe that I'm actually keeping her safe by not being there with her. I couldn't possible do that much damage if it was only me who stayed with her. I didn't trust myself though.

I decided not to hunt anymore, so I went back to my jacket and phone. I had a message waiting for me when I got back. I wonder if Alice stopped thinking about that yet. I flipped open my phone and called my voicemail.

"_Edward it's me again. I just got another vision that you need to hear. You have to go back because I got a vision with the doctor again. She came into the room and said…"_

The message ended. I looked at my phone to see what happened to my phone and I figured out it died! I got so angry I threw it at a tree making it shatter into a million little pieces. I then started running again, but instead of going to back to Forks or home I went the way to Oklahoma. I needed to find Victoria before anything else.

Whatever Bella's is going to the doctors for can wait. I can't let _her_ be harmed.

* * *

A/N: Well I'm typing up the next chapter in Bella's POV. I think this may be one of the only times I have Edward's POV. It was hard because I couldn't decide what he would do whenever he left Forks. So yea, I hope you liked it.


	3. Finding the Truth

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews, story alerts, and author alerts! I love getting them. I'm also glad you all loved Edward's POV. Also I'm still taking votes for the sex of Bella's baby! By the way the things that happen in the book and my story just happen a bit earlier. Just to let you know…

July 7, 2008

I don't own anything…

* * *

_I have to tell Charlie_, I told myself as I started to make our dinner. It's been two weeks since I have found out that I am pregnant. How do you tell someone your sonly daughter, a person you never thought this would happen to, is now carrying a half vampire baby? Well, for starters I'll have to leave out the half vampire part. I don't need more questions.

"Hey Bella," Jacob called.

"Jake," I said dropping the wooden spoon, "what are you doing here? Do you want to stay for dinner?"

"Well, I'm here to get you to tell your dad about your, uh, situation. And I would love to stay for dinner, thank you."

I groaned and walked back to the kitchen. I started stirring the pasta angrily without looking up at Jacob's confused eyes.

"Did I say something wrong?" he asked sitting in _his_ old chair.

I closed my eyes to try and shake that thought. "Look, I'm glad you're here, but I don't need you here to make me tell my dad about the _baby_," I said harsher than I meant to.

"I know you don't. I'm here really for two reasons. One, to make sure you don't slip and tell him about the _bloodsuckers_. Two, to enjoy the food," he said smiling

I narrowed my eyes. "And what makes you think I would slip and tell Charlie?"

"I just don't want him hammering you with questions and you just saying that to him to move onto another subject. I'm just looking out for you since _Edward_," I winced, "won't."

I smiled at him, but didn't say anything else. I didn't trust my voice. It would probably be too shaky. I mean it was the first time, in almost two months, I heard _his_ name.

Charlie came in about five minutes later. After everyone had their food and started eating I then thought it was the right time. Well, sort of.

"Dad," I said taking a deep breath and putting down my fork, "I have to tell you something. It has to do with me being sick every morning."

Charlie put down his fork to look at me then to Jacob and back to me. "What's this about?"

I looked at Jacob who gave me a questionable look. I simply shrugged. "Dad, I'm pregnant."

He looked at Jacob and narrowed his eyes. "Did you do this to her?"

He shook his head. "No sir, I wouldn't do that."

"Dad, Jacob didn't sleep with me. Someone else did, however," I said looking down at the scar James gave to me. This was my personal hell at the moment.

"Edward did this?" I stayed silent. "Edward Cullens knocked you up and then left you to care for his child by yourself?" Charlie asked raising his voice.

"Dad, he didn't know. He left before I even knew. No one but you, Jacob and Billy know about me."

"How did Billy find out before me?"

"That would be my fault Charlie. I accidentally let it slip when I took Bella to the doctors two weeks ago," Jacob said looking at Charlie without blinking.

"Well Bella, I will support you in any… wait you've known for how long?"

I winced. "I've had an idea that this happened for three weeks, but I've known for sure for about two weeks."

"Isabella, why didn't you tell me then? Why didn't you tell me before so that I could have taken you?" he asked. He actually looked sad that I didn't tell him earlier.

"I don't know. I was just scared about how you would react. I just don't want to disappoint you."

Charlie sighed and looked down. "Are you going to keep it?"

I nodded. "Yeah I am."

"Good. Bella, I'm so proud that you are going to take responsibility for your actions. It takes a lot of guts to care for a child at your age with no father."

I smiled. And that was that. Now I just had to figure out how to tell Renee. I went against a rule of hers. A rule that was pretty much imprinted in my head since I was old enough to understand what she was talking about.

When we told her she wasn't as disappointed as I thought she would be. She said she would visit me soon to help me through this, and maybe take me to one of my doctor's appointments. She wanted to take me to the appointment where I could find out the sex of the baby.

I never thought I would have this much support…

**(One month later. Mid-November.)**

"Call me please! Jake I have left you like ten messages! I need to know if you are coming to my doctor's appointment tomorrow. Also are you feeling okay? You looked pale the other day, and you felt extremely hot. Call me back, bye," I said closing my cell phone.

I groaned, putting my hand back on the wheel. I was on my way to work. I started working at the Newton's outdoor store. The good thing about this job was the money, and it got me out of the house. 

That way I wouldn't have time for being depressed. Jacob really helped me with that, but lately it seems like he's leaving me too.

"Bella, we aren't going to need you because it's been a very slow day," Mrs. Newton said as I came through the sliding doors.

"Oh okay, cool," I said trying not to sound sad. So, I quickly got out of there and decided to go for a drive. Anywhere but home.

I decided to drive to a place I haven't really gone to since _he_ left. The meadow. When I got there it took me a long time to walk up to the actual meadow part, but when I did I realized it was worth it.

The sunlight showed through the trees. I quickly made my way to the middle of the meadow and laid down. I felt so relaxed and calm for once in my life since _they_ left me. Also it was the first time in two months I haven't felt sick.

_Crunch_.

I jerked up quickly and looked around. I didn't see anything so I stood up and looked around. Suddenly a black figure moved into the light. It wasn't a human for sure because it's skin was too perfect. It was a vampire.

"Laurent, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"Bella?" he said sort of confused.

"You remembered."

"Who can forget the only human to fall in love with a vampire? I'm glad I ran into you though," he said taking a step forward.

"Why?"

"Do you remember Victoria, Bella?" I nodded. "Ah, good. Well, as you know Edward killed her mate, James." I winced at the memory. "You see, she is still very upset about that and is seeking revenge. Do you know how you play into this Bella?" I shook my head. "Well, Victoria could just go and kill Edward, but she didn't think that would satisfy her enough. So, she thought she should go mate for mate. Your death for James's death."

_Lie, _a velvet voice said in my head.

"You know Edward will be here pretty soon," I said quickly hoping my voice wouldn't stutter.

"See I thought he would be, so I went to their home earlier. Do you know what I found out? No one is home. It looks like no one has lived in that house for a few months now. And it looks like they didn't care about you enough to protect you from out kind," he said pacing up and down.

_You're going to have to lie better Bella,_ the voice said again.

"He's not the only one who protects me, you know? So what if the Cullens left? I don't need them," I said trying to convince myself that too. It wasn't working to well for me.

He laughed as he started to pace in front of me. He took a deep breath and stopped, froze almost. "If they left roughly a month or so ago, then why do you still have his scent on you. It's faint, but it's there."

_Do not tell him you're pregnant. Stay still_, the voice said.

"Are you pregnant?" Laurent asked. I stayed silent. "With his child?" I said nothing. "How is that possible? Vampires cannot conceive, but humans can. Maybe that's why." He didn't think about it too much after that before he got into a crouching position. He then pounced, but he was knocked to the ground. For wolves came out of the forest.

They all went and attacked Laurent, killing him. A reddish brown one seemed to nod at me to leave I didn't hesitate. I just ran far away. I couldn't watch them tear apart Laurent, and I didn't want to found out what they would do with me.

I knew who that velvet voice was. I just couldn't believe it.

Was this his way of protecting me, or am I just hallucinating it?

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

The next day I was just getting out of work when my phone started vibrating in my back pocket. "Hello?" I answered.

"Bella, it's me," Jacob said on the other line. "Look I need to talk to you. Can you meet me by the cliffs in La Push?"

"Sure, sure. Hey, are you okay?"

He chuckled into the receiver. "Depend on how you look at it. I'll see you soon."

"Bye," I said, but the phone went dead. What did he need to talk to me about?

By the time I go there, Jacob and some other boys from la Push were already there. When I got out of my truck everyone stopped talking and looked over to me. It seemed like Jacob was the only one who was excited to see me.

"Bella," he said running over and hugging me. "This is Sam, Paul and Embry." I nodded to them.

_Don't get to close, Bella. Don't get them mad either. They are not safe,_ the musical voice said in my head again.

I wanted to yell at it and tell him nothing was wrong with Jacob and he couldn't hurt me! But I didn't because everyone would think I was crazy. Even though I already thought I was crazy for hearing voices in my head.

"Jacob, I don't think we should tell her. She doesn't need to worry about something else," the oldest one, Sam, said.

"If you want to protect her then you should listen to Sam, Jacob. He knows what he's talking about," Paul said.

Jacob rolled his eyes at them. "I want to protect her that's why I'm going to tell her about us."

"Tell me what?" I asked. They all looked surprised that I talked. "Jacob, what's going on?"

He turned to me. "Bella, do you remember when I told you that story that got you to believe _Edward_ was a bloodsucker?" I nodded, flinching at the name. "Do you remember the only thing that can stop them really?"

I thought about it, trying to remember the whole story. I could only pay attention to the vampire part, but there had to be something I could remember about the other part. "Werewolves," I whispered so low I thought only vampires could have picked it up.

Jacob smiled. "That's right. Told you she would figure it out with a little help. Now Bella, I'm not allowed to tell you this, but I had too. Sam agreed with me that it is the only way to keep you safe, but he just doesn't like that you are basically half a _bloodsucker_ right now. Also you smell like one," he said scrunching up his nose.

At first I didn't say anything. I mean I thought he would be my normal friend who knew everything about my secret, but not anymore. Also, do I really smell like _him_? People keep on telling me that, but I can't tell. "So, you all are werewolves?"

They all nodded and then Sam took a step forward. "I know this is a lot to handle Bella, but there is one other thing you should know." He looked at Jacob like he wanted him to tell me. When Jacob turned his head away from us, Sam sighed, looking back at me. "A female is back. Not from the Cullens, but someone alone. She seems to be after you. We are trying to catch her, but we haven't yet."

My eyes went wide. Not only was I feeling fait for some reason, but now I had a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. "Victoria," I whispered.

Jacob came to my side putting an arm around me, making me feel even weaker. "We think she has a connection with the male who cornered you in that meadow yesterday. Do you know?"

I nodded my head trying to shake loose of Jacob before I fainted, but I didn't even budge him. "Yeah, they were in the same coven. He was there to kill me for her. How long has she been here?"

His fist clenched. "A week or so. Don't worry Bella. We will watch you and Charlie to make sure she doesn't get to you. Come on, I'll take you to your doctor's appointment."

I nodded as he led me to the truck. We he grabbed my wrist to help me up, I almost fainted again. Why was this happening to me? I never did this before, but he wasn't a werewolf before. Did that have something to do with it?

"Okay Bella, everything seems good so we're going to do a sonogram," Jane said putting the gel on my stomach. I shivered at the coldness. She moved the transducer (a wand) around until she found a peanut shaped thing. "And that," she said pointing to it, "is your baby."

I looked at it, memorized by it. The little thing was perfect even though it didn't look real. It still was perfect. "Wow."

Jane smile as she got up off her chair. "Are you cold?"

"No," I said not taking me eyes off the screen.

"Maybe it's just the gel, but you stomach was freezing. I mean normally it's not that cold."

I tore my eyes away. Oh no. "Poor circulation. It runs in the family," I said using the excuse _he_ always used.

When I walked into the waiting room, Jacob rushed over to my side. "So, is everything okay?"

I was now extremely glad he noticed I was feeling faint and decided not to come in with me. That way he wouldn't have heard what Jane said, and because I wasn't feeling faint in there, but now I am. "Yeah, everything's fine."

When I got home I went straight to my room and took the sonogram picture out of pocket. I sat down on my bed and stared at it. It's not going to be human. If it comes out human, then it's won't stay human for forever.

Tears started falling down my eyes. This was a time where I could have really used _him_. _He _would have been able to comfort me. _He_ would have known how to make me calm. "Why did you go?" I whispered. It was a question that would never be answered.

_He_ was gone, and left me to care for _his _only child.

I sighed getting up off my bed. I wiped my eyes to get rid of the tears before I went over to my window and looked out. I looked up into the gray sky and wanted to start crying again, but I couldn't. I had to stay strong, not just for me, but for my baby. I just had too.

I then looked out into the forest right next to my house. Suddenly something ran into the forest making the trees shake. For some reason my heart jumped like it knew who it was. I think I knew who it was too, I just wasn't sure if I could believe it.

Why would _he_ come back if it was him? He didn't love me, or care about me, so why would he come back just to look at me looking out the window? What was he doing back here anyways? Isn't he supposed to be somewhere in New Hampshire with his family?

I shook my head to clear the thoughts, and brought the sonogram picture up to my face. As I looked at it, I became sad again. It simply would never be normal. No matter if it was a vampire or a human. It would have a vampire for a father, and a mother who wanted nothing else, but to be a vampire. It would grow up in the world knowing these weren't just myths, but they were real.

What am I going to do?

* * *

A/N: I hoped you liked this chapter. If you guys tell me what the sex of the baby should be, and I have a clear cut win, then I'll post the next chapter either today, or tomorrow. So please help me out, because I don't know what I want it to be. Thanks!


	4. Wondering Messages

A/N: Okay well the races are close! Review quickly if you want her to have a boy or girl. I think next chapter you will find out what it is!

July 8, 2008

I don't own Twilight.

* * *

I was staring out my window watching the rain bounce off the glass. I wanted to see something move in the forest, but nothing was. It only happened that one day a few weeks ago. Every time I looked into the forest my heart would jump, but slowly it would sink when I realized nothing was coming out of it.

I started thinking of Romeo and Juliet, for some odd reason. I was thinking of the balcony scene when Romeo snuck into the Capulet's garden to see Juliet. That's when they professed the love to one another and when they decided to get married. Now how could Juliet just say yes to a guy she has only known for one hour, and how could I not say yes to a guy I've been dating for month? We both seemed stubborn, but maybe she realized she found her soul mate.

I guess I just didn't realize what I had until I lost it. No, that's a lie. I did know what I had. I would always feel out of place standing next to a god like him. I knew he was too good for me, but maybe I took him for granted. Maybe I didn't think that I would lose him because he would always tell me how much he loved me. Maybe I never thought about what I would do whenever he figured out he was too good for me.

I looked down at my belly and place my hand over it. I've been pregnant for about three and a half months now. I could tell I was starting to show, but I don't think anyone else could. I was so self conscious now. I would always wear something bigger to school. Most days I would just wear a sweat shirt or something. I mean I gained 15 pounds! Man I'm going to be huge!

I didn't tell anyone that I was pregnant. Not even Angela and Ben, who are the only ones who keep talking to me. I feel bad not telling them this, but I didn't want people to know. I felt so ashamed of myself for some reason. I mean I had the mom who married right out of high school and had me as a teenager. That means the child isn't supposed to be that bad. Well, in most cases, the child is supposed to do what the mother never did. Like go to college, provide for themselves. I couldn't do that now because I'm almost in the same position as she was. I'm just not married and have no idea where the father is. Also the father isn't actually human…

I sighed and turned away from the window. I would give up for today, but maybe tomorrow something would happen. I walked over to my computer to check my email. I haven't done this for awhile, and you could tell because Renee left me 5 messages.

_Bella, can you scan the picture of your sonogram? I want to see what my first grandchild looks like! Also we need to talk to see if you are going to find out the gender. I think you should, but it's your choice. Please email me back soon, we haven't really talked for ages._

I sighed exiting out of it and opening up the next one.

_Bella, are you okay? You haven't emailed me back yet. It's been two days. Are you going through a mood swing where you are mad at me for not being there with you? Cause if you are just email me and tell me, I'll book the first flight to Forks to spend time with you. _

No, I wasn't mad at her, or going through a mood swing. I can't believe she would even say that! I shouldn't read the rest of her emails. I should just not talk… never mind.

_Bella, hello, are you alive? Why haven't you answered any of my emails?_

Wow, she needs a life. Or a phone. Why doesn't she just call me if she wants to talk?

_Isabella Marie Swan, what are you doing? Answer my emails, please! I'm starting to worry about you._

One more at least. I went to open it up, but realized it wasn't from my mother. I looked at the email address and realized I had no idea who it was. I shook my head and kept it as it was. I guess I should email my mother back.

_Mom, I'm okay. Stop worrying so much. I just haven't read my emails in awhile. If you were really worried about me why didn't you just pick up your phone and call me. You know how I am when it comes to reading emails. I'll email you a copy of the sonogram, and I don't know if I want to know the gender. Charlie says I should, but I don't know if I want to find out_- because that will make it seem real, I was about say, but I didn't- _I'll see you when you visit me. Love you, Bella._

Next I sent an attachment of the sonogram picture and hit the send button. After I finished that I sat there glaring at the email I hadn't opened yet. The subject was marked urgent. There was no subject though. How could something be so urgent when you didn't even know what the subject that was urgent was?

I moved the curser over to the bolded message. I think I'll open it to see what's so urgent…

"Bella," Charlie yell, making me jump and causing the mouse to fly into the air, "I'm going to order some pizza, what do you want on it?"

I waited for my heart to slow down while I thought of what I might like. "Um, mushrooms, pepperoni, and sausage," I said as I looked around for that mouse. Wow, I really threw it fair.

"Eh, okay. I'll get that on half," he said.

_Well sorry I'm having a weird pregnancy craving_, I wanted to yell back, but I found the mouse so I didn't worry about it. I got up off the floor and placed the mouse back onto its pad by the computer screen. Great now all my courage for opening up the message is gone.

I paced around my room wondering if I really needed to open it up or not. I mean it did say urgent, but what if someone typed in the wrong address, or what if someone thought they knew me, but the really didn't? Maybe it was just something my mom did on Phil's new email address or something, just so I would have to answer back one of her emails. No she won't do that.

I sat back down staring at the monitor. Should I? Will someone give me a reason not to sit here and wonder if I should open this email or not? Please…

"Oh, Bella, Jacob called you earlier when you were taking a nap. You might want to call him back," Charlie called up the stairs before blasting the TV again.

_Wait, when did I take a nap? _I shrugged and got up and walked to my phone, happy I didn't need to sit there and wonder if I should open the urgent email. I dialed his number. It took two rings for someone to answer. "Hello?" a groggy voice said.

"Jacob, is that you?" I asked not sure.

"Bella, oh thank god, I thought you died! Charlie said you were taking a nap like three hours ago, you never take a nap that long. Are you okay?" he asked rushed.

When the hell did I take a nap? I mean three hours ago I was looking out my window, and yes I do look out my window that long. "Jake, I'm fine. I was just sleepy?" I said sort of confused. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, but I'm on my way over. It's my shift at your house," he said. It sounded like he was getting up, and falling…

"You don't need to watch me. I'll be fine.''

"Not if she comes to your house and there is no one there to protect you since that _bloodsucker_ had to leave you alone with _his_ child…"

"Jacob, what have I said about the word bloodsucker?" I asked annoyed.

He sighed. "That you hate the word and you would like it if I just called them vampires," he said. He then started laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny?"

"You sounded… sounded so muc...much like a mother…there. It was just funny how you said that."

I started laughing too. I didn't realize that I was sounding like a mom. Charlie kept telling me that, and so did Jacob. I just my maternal instinct was kicking in. "Well, I'm going to be a mom."

"I never said it was a bad thing. Just a funny thing. Okay, well I have to go. If you see a big brown wolf, don't shoot it," he said teasingly.

"Since when do you think I would shot anything?"

"Good point. Bye."

I didn't even bother saying bye before I hung up. It's useless because they just hang up before you can even say goodbye. I groaned. I was starting to get hungry. I hope the pizza will be here soon. I don't think I can hold out any longer.

I walked down the stairs as the doorbell rang. I grabbed the money off the counter and walked to the door. The guy was there with the pizza in one hand. "That will be 11.35," he said in a deep voice. It seemed like he was trying to hide something…

"Um, okay," I said getting 15 dollars out of the cash in my hand. "You can keep the change."

"Thank you," he said coughing a bit. When our hands grazed, I was immediately cold. Was he a…

"Bella, I need-"Jacob said rushing into the kitchen, but froze as soon as he saw the pizza delivery guy.

"Jacob, long time no see," Charlie said getting off the couch to go and say hello to him.

I didn't take my eyes off the figure in front of me. I knew him from somewhere, I just didn't know where. I could hear Jacob trying to get to me, but Charlie was blocking the path. Not a good move I say.

"Bella, get away-"

"Thanks for the tip, gotta go," the guy said taking the money, giving me the pizza and leaving. As soon as he was five feet from the house he took off full speed. I mean vampire speed. What the heck was going on?

"Bella," Jacob said grabbing my shoulders. "I need to tell you something right now."

I was in shock pretty much. I didn't say anything so I just nodded as he led me into the kitchen. I put the pizza on the counter and then sat down in a chair in the dining room. Charlie came in casually and got a piece of pizza out of the box and then returned to his game.

"Bella, that wasn't just a _blood-_ I mean _vampire_. No, that was a Cullen," he said in a low voice.

I looked at him, and then everything went black.

"What happened to her," Charlie's voice asked loudly.

"I don't know. She just passed out suddenly. I don't know what happened to her," Jacob's voice said , sounding worried.

"What did you say to her?"

Ugh I had to get up. I opened my eyes and turned my head to see Charlie in Jacob's face, well not exactly because Jacob was a good 7 inches taller than Charlie. "What happened?" I asked in a soft voice.

Jacob turned to me smiling. I guess he as happy I was awake. "Nothing, nothing, all that matters is you're okay."

"I'm going to get you some water, Bella. I'll be back," Charlie said turning around to leave.

"And some pizza, please," I called after him. He nodded. "Now, Jacob, what really happened to me? All I remember was you saying something about the pizza guy and then everything going black. What did you tell me again?"

He sighed, sitting down on my bed next to me. "That wasn't just a pizza deliver guy. It was a _vampire_. Not just any _vampire_, however. It was a Cullen."

Now I remembered why I passed out. Even though sitting this close to Jacob was making me faint again. "Do you know which one?"

He shrugged. "I think it was the big one. The more muscular one. It definitely was _Edward_, or he wouldn't be alive right now."

I flinched at how harsh his tone was. "Emmett," I whispered. Why the hell would Emmett be here and not Edward. Did Emmett care more about me then Edward, or Alice even? I mean I knew he liked to see me fall on my face, but did he really want to see me again? "Do you have any idea why he was here?"

Jacob shook his head. "That's were _blood-_ I mean _vampires_ have it better. Werewolves can only read each other thoughts when we are phased. It helps us communicate."

"Only Edward can read minds. No one else in his family can," I said thoughtfully.

"Hmm, well what can the other ones do? You said they had powers too."

"Here you go Bella, enjoy," Charlie said coming into the room with pizza and water for me. "Jacob, do you want anything?"

"No thank you, Charlie. I can't stay that much longer."

He nodded leaving the room.

"Okay," I said taking a bite of my pizza, "Alice can see the future, but like only when you make up your mind about it. Jasper can manipulate emotions."

"You mean he can control what you feel?"

I nodded my head taking another bite. "Pretty much, but he can also sense what they are. Like he could tell if you were happy or sad. Then if he wanted too he could make you happy."

"That should go against the laws of nature," Jacob said disgusted.

"Well you should too, I mean you can phase into a freaking werewolf."

"So? _Bloodsuckers_ can read minds, see the future, and manipulate emotions! That's just wrong."

"Says you, but the _vampire_," I said glaring at him, "may think otherwise. And humans think that for the both of you!" Wow, he knew just how to get under my skin sometimes! Ugh I just couldn't stand it.

"Whatever. Well, I have to get back to my post. I'll make sure they don't come near you," he said kissing me on the forehead and leaving my room.

When he left I fell back on my bed. Whoa, that was a big blow when he did that. Eh, I think I need to tell him soon not to do that anymore. Maybe just the whole touching thing because every time he does that I just want to pass out again. What's wrong with me?

I got up and went over to my window again. The trees moved again, but I knew it would probably be Jacob just looking around for Emmett or something. Speaking of which, why did he come here in a pizza deliver outfit? What's the deal with that? Why did he just come out and be like, 'Hey Bella!'? Was that too hard to do?

I spun around and walked over to my radio. I put in mix CD I made for my truck, but since I tore out my stereo in my truck I really couldn't play it anywhere, but here. I was walking back to my pizza when Barely Breathing came on. I hummed along to the lyrics as I took a bite of my pizza.

My computer _pinged_. Meaning I had a new email.

Ugh email! I still had to decide if I was going to read that one email or not, crap. Oh well I had to read this one first. Of course, it was from Renee. I'm not that surprised it didn't take her a day to get back to me. She probably is bouncing off the walls that I replied.

_Bella, thank you for finally answering my emails! I'm glad you and the baby are good. I love the sonogram picture. If you don't find out the gender then I will go insane! I already am impatient enough to find out! Please find out, for me! Love Mom_.

I sighed. I don't know if I want to find out the sex of the baby. What if it's a boy, will it remind me so much of _him_? What if it's a girl, will it look like me, but have _his_ green eyes? I don't know because if I found out it will make it seem much more real than I want. I don't want to raise a child by myself, I want help.

I don't want help from my father or Jacob, however. I would much rather have help from _him_ and _his_ family. It would be so much better if they were all here to help me through this, and they would probably know why I felt faint every time Jacob came near me.

I got up off my seat near the computer and walked over to my rocking chair. I remember seeing _him_ sit here the first night he stayed over. I was so surprised then, I never thought he would spend the whole night watching me, but it was the first of many.

I looked at my computer. Do I really want to find out who sent me that email? Yes, I do, but yet I don't know if I do. I'm afraid of who it might be. What if it's someone I once knew? What if it's just Angela or Ben or Jacob contacting me? I would never know until I check it.

I sighed, getting up and walking back to my computer. I placed my hand on the mouse and scrolled it to the only bolded email left in my inbox. I took a deep breath before I double clicked, making the email pop up.

_Bella, you must be very confused right now. You are probably wondering who this is. It's Alice. I know Edward doesn't want me to contact you, but I have too. I had a vision, well a few actually, but I have only had one that actually went through the whole thing. I saw the doctor come in and tell you the sex of your baby! You're pregnant! I can't believe you didn't tell anyone before we left! Well you probably didn't know then… Anyways, Edward should get my message sometime, but right now he is trying to track down Victoria, he's worried you would get hurt if she's still out there in the world. Emmett and I are coming back, we want to talk to you about everything. Why we left, why Edward said some of the things he said, even though he should tell you that. Also we want to know how this is possible! I think the family might come back soon. I know Edward wants too. Don't email me back, just please come to our house. We need to talk soon, and I mean really soon. Please come and don't hold it against us that we left. You will understand once we explain everything. Love Alice._

I stared at the email in complete shock. Now this would really make me pass out. How did Alice know my email address in the first place? What did they have to explain to me? What was going on? Were 

they all coming back just because I was pregnant, or because they actually missed me? I had to know.

I got up and put on my sweat shirt. I went downstairs to see Charlie still in front of the TV. I think he was watching baseball. Maybe I could just sneak out behind him…

"Bella, where are you going at 8:30 at night?" he asked turning around to see me leave.

Busted. I need to lie. "Um, I'm going over to Angela's. She just called and wanted to know if I wanted to watch a movie with her and Ben tonight. Would that be okay? I haven't really seen her outside of school."

He thought about it for a few seconds. "I guess that's okay, but don't be out too late. You need rest now that you're pregnant."

I nodded headed out the door. This would be difficult to get past Jacob. Why did people care where I was going? It's not like it's their baby…

"Bella, where are you going this late?" Jacob asked coming out of the woods.

"I'm going to watch a movie with Angela and Ben," I said turning around to look at him.

"I'll come too, to watch out for you since _they_ are back."

"No! You should stay here and look out for Charlie. Don't worry about me; Emmett won't come after me. If he does he'll just want to talk to me. I'll be okay, just please let me go. I want to have somewhat of a normal life."

He thought about it for a second. Geez I felt like I had two dads I had to lie too. "Okay, I should look after Charlie anyways. You go, but you shouldn't stay out late. If you do I'm coming out and looking for you."

"Okay, bye," I said running for my truck. As soon as I got in, I turned it on and sped out of my house. I took the familiar roads to the Cullens house. I then took the sharp, invisible turn to their house. It was harder to find in the dark, which wasn't good because I could barely find it as is.

When I pulled in front of their house I took a deep breath. This is it. Time to meet with my baby's father's family once more…

* * *

A/N: Sorry for leaving you guys on a cliff hanger. I had to though. As for my other stories, I'm going to update them this week. I have too because I'm leaving for Bethany on Sunday. I'll try to update this once more before I leave.

Also, we have a dilemma. We have a tie for the baby's gender. 6 say boy and 6 say girl. Some really don't care. If you don't help me out a bit, then it will be a bit longer until you find out the gender. So, please vote!


	5. Dark Memories

A/N: Okay, well, we have a dilemma again. We are tied still. I think it's 13-13. Something like that. You guys are making this difficult. If there isn't a clear cut winner soon, I'm just going to chose. Sorry, but you guys are going both ways a bit too much. Well enjoy this chapter:)

July 20, 2008

I still don't anything, and it will never change.

* * *

I sat in my truck with my hands on the steering wheel, ready to leave if I really wanted to. I did want to just turn around and leave, make them feel like they made me feel, but I knew I couldn't. I wanted to see them again; I wanted to know what really happened and why they left me. I just needed to know everything that happened. They also had a right to know about me, and they could help me find out some things.

I took a deep breath and opened my truck door. Okay now I just needed to put one foot on the ground and I'll be good to go, somewhat. When my feet hit the ground a ton of weight fell to my shoulders. Every step I took to their house just got harder and harder. I didn't want to face the truth. I just want to go home and pretend I never found that message.

I reached my hand up to knock on the door, but before I could Alice was already opening it up. "Bella!" she squealed, hugging me. "When was the last time you read your email? I sent you that message days ago!" She pulled me into to their house and walked me over to a couch. It was just like it was before.

"That's why Emmett was at your house today. We just wanted to make sure you weren't dead. Edward said you never look at your emails and when you do it's a rare occasion. I was about to come to your house, so I could see you again. It was torture waiting as long as we did," she said.

"Alice, breathe, please. This is too overwhelming for me. What's happening? Why did you come back? Actually," I said turning away from her, "why did you leave in the first place? I think I have a right to know what happened that day."

Emmett came into the room then and stood in front of me. "Bella, we would love to explain to you what Edward did, but he needs to do that himself. What we can say is no one, mostly Edward, wanted to leave you, but we did and we regret it every day."

I sighed. That didn't answer much. "Why did you contact me?"

Alice looked hurt that I even asked that question. "Didn't you miss us at all, Bella?"

"Of course I missed you. All of you, including Rosalie! But _you_ left me! You left me stranded here wondering what happened to everyone telling me how much they loved me, but then just leaving me. You guys left me here, pregnant and alone. You don't have any idea how hard that is for a girl my age," I said standing up.

"We should have brought Jasper," Emmett said putting his hands on my shoulder. "Bella, please calm down. Let us explain. Edward should be here soon, and then you will know everything you need too. Please sit back down."

He didn't need to ask me again. I felt relaxed just by his touch. I was getting used to the warmth of Jacob's touch, but I missed the coldness of the Cullens touch. Also I actually didn't feel like throwing up. "Okay, explain please."

"Bella," Alice said turning to me, "we left because of what happened on your 18th birthday. We were all afraid that it would happen again, and this time we wouldn't be able to stop it. We were afraid that you would get killed just by being with us. Edward was so terrified that day that he started making plans to leave you that night. He was so set on the sooner we leave, the sooner you are safe. We all knew he would find a way to kill himself if you were to die. That's why we all left when he told us too. We were afraid mostly for you, but also for Edward. When we saw Edward, about a week after he left you, he was a zombie. He didn't talk to anyone and Jasper was just as miserable because he felt everything Edward did. He tried to make Edward happy, but he just repelled it. Bella, we never wanted to leave. No one did."

"Now will you please explain what happened to you?" Emmett asked. Alice hit him on the arm for that one.

I actually didn't know what to say. I was still in shock for what they said. I mean they are pretty good liars considering they live a lie every day. How could this be any different? I mean for all I know they are lying to me right now. I mean how I would I even know if they were telling the truth?

When I finally decided to say something, Alice stopped me. She was very still and Emmett was watching her. When she snapped back into reality she looked at Emmett and rolled her eyes. "Edward's phone died, so he threw it at a tree before my message was even finished. Do you want to go and find him? He is heading somewhere near Oklahoma."

Emmett rolled his eyes too and nodded. "He overacts too much. I'll be back," he said running out the door.

"Now, Bella, please explain how this is possible," Alice said turning her attention back to me.

I shrugged. "Your guess is as good as mine. That's why I didn't believe the doctor at first when she told me. Then she showed me the sonogram and I finally started believe. Well actually when I woke up every morning sick, I sort of warmed up to the idea. I just don't know how it happened."

"Well, yes you do, you just don't know how it's possible," she said smiling. "How far along are you anyways?"

"Um, like three and a half months. I mean apparently it was conceived in September and considering its now January I guess I'm right." Sure I might be being a little mean, but I had a right. They did leave me.

"Bella, I know your mad at us, and you have every right to be, just please hear us out. It kills me to know that you are disgusted with me," she said pretty much reading my mind. "Now, is everything normal? I mean a vampire is the father."

_This will be the hard part_, I thought. "Sort of."

"What do you mean 'sort of'?"

"Well apparently my stomach is freezing cold, like your body, and every time Jacob, or one of his pack brothers, comes near me, I feel faint. I don't know why, but whenever he touches me, I almost black out, but when he's out of the room, I'm totally fine."

"Wait, did you say pack brothers?"

"Um, yeah."

"Is Jacob a werewolf?" Alice asked surprised.

"Yeah he is," I said softly.

She groaned and got up swiftly to pace the room. "Leaving you was a big mistake, but this is just worse. I can't believe we left you with a werewolf in your life. I can't believe you let a werewolf in your life. That's not a smart decision, Bella."

"Where do you have a right to tell me if it's a safe decision?" I asked furiously. Wow, mood swings suck. "They aren't any worse than vampires are. They at least didn't leave me." That was a low blow…

Alice stopped in her tracks and looked at me. "You aren't going to let this go, are you?" I stay silent now ashamed of what I said. "Well, I don't blame you. I wish you would be a bit more understanding, but you were always stubborn. And Bella, they are more dangerous than us. We have willpower. They don't. When they get too angry they will phase and may hurt you. They can't control themselves either."

I looked at the clock. It was 9:30, meaning Jacob would be coming soon to find me. "Alice I have to go. I'm sort of on a tight leash now that I'm pregnant and all," I said getting up. She came right in front of me block the door. "What are you doing?"

"Will you please come back tomorrow? Edward should be found and brought here, and we really need to talk to you about everything."

"I'll think about it, but it would have to be after school and work."

"Okay, I'll pick you up from work," she said smiling.

"Please don't. I need time to think about this. I'm not sure if I can trust you guys again. Being pregnant is giving me a different point of view. I can't be that forgiving, even if I do love you guys. Also I can't deal with being that hurt again. It was too much, and if you leave again, it can be really bad for the baby," I said heading to the door.

"Bella, please believe us. We never meant to hurt you as much as we did."

I nodded and opened the door to walk out. This was too much for me.

When I got into my truck and drove away, I stopped five minutes after I left their house and parked my truck. I put my head on my hands, which were resting on the steering wheel, and took deep breathes. I needed to be calm if I was going to face Jacob soon.

After about five minutes of sitting there I started my truck back up and continued to my house. When I turned off my truck and stepped out, I wrapped my arms around me tightly. It's was freezing outside! It wasn't this could early.

I started to run to the front door, until a dark figure jumped in front of me, making me jump back a foot. "Jacob what the heck? You almost gave me a heart attack. Do you have to be so sneaky?"

He sighed and looked around. Then he looked down at me and stepped back. "Bella, where were you?"

"I told you I went to Angela's to watch a movie with her and Ben, but I got too tired to finish it so I came home earlier than I planned."

"Bella, you're a terrible liar. Were you at the _leech's_ house?" he accused. "You have their scent on you. Why would you go there and not tell me about it?"

"Why do I have to tell you were I'm going? This isn't your child. I don't have to tell you anything about me if I don't want to. You didn't need to know that I was going to the _Cullens_ house to see them. Maybe I wanted to see them."

"Bella, I have to protect you. That's why you have to tell me where you are going, especially when you're going to those _bloodsuckers_. And I don't care if your baby isn't mine because it might as well be because I don't see the father walking around here and protecting you!" he yelled at me.

"Jacob, I don't need you to protect me!" I yelled back. "I don't need anyone to protect me! I'll do fine by myself. Maybe then I won't have you trying to act like _he_ never loved me. You just act like _he_ used me, and _he_ never cared about me. Well newsflash, Jacob, _he_ did love me. And _he's _coming back here for me."

Jacob scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Why because he heard that you are pregnant with his child from his freaky future telling 'sister'? Bella, that doesn't mean he loves you! He hasn't been with you the whole entire time. I have been! He left you before, what makes you think he won't do it again?"

"Because he would never leave me alone to care for his child by myself."

"I thought you didn't want him back here just because you are pregnant. I thought you wanted him back here because he missed you and he loves you. What, were you just lying?"

I sighed. "Yes, I was. Jake, it's hard to do this by myself."

"You're not alone though, Bells. I'm here with you."

"No, you aren't. Don't you get it? I _need_ him here with me. I love him too much. This child needs its real father in its life. And I need him in my life too," I whispered with tears running down my cheek. Then I brushed past Jacob into my house.

When I got to my room I just buried my face into my pillow and cried. I really needed _him_. I couldn't do it without him. He would know how to calm me down. He would hold back my hair when I threw up in the morning, and he would never complain. He was _perfect_. Jacob wasn't.

_Beep, beep._

I picked up my head and looked at me wet pillow. I must have cried a long time last night before I fell asleep. I rolled over and got out of bed to get ready for school. When I went downstairs to make some breakfast, a knock came to the door.

_It's probably Jacob, coming to yell at me more, or apologize,_ I thought as I walked to the door eating a piece of toast on the way. _If he yells at me, I may punch him._

When I opened the door, I froze. When I moved my head upward to see his face, I slammed the door shut quickly. Why did he have to come now? Couldn't he have waited until later tonight? Where was a werewolf when you need one?

"Isabella, please let me in," his musical voice said on the other side of the door. "I have to talk to you. Please let me in."

I had to open the door sometime, or I could just skip school. Then again, if he really wanted to, he could smash through a wall right now… I took a deep breath and put my bag over my shoulder and opened the door.

There he was, standing there all god-like and what not. With his perfect skin, and topaz eyes. Wow, did I miss his eyes. I almost wanted to slap myself though because there was no way this was actually happening to me. Not after everything I've been through these past three months.

I squeezed past him, and shut the door behind me as I made my way to my truck. "Bella, please let me explain my actions," he pleaded blocking my way.

"Edward, please. I don't have time right now. I have to go to school," I said ducking my body around him.

I heard him sigh, but before I could look back at him, he was right in front of my door looking at me with pleading eyes. "Please, love. I need to talk to you about everything that happened. I have to explain my actions before you hate me even more."

"I don't hate you, Edward," I whispered looking at the ground.

"You don't?"

I sighed and looked around. "How could I? I was in love with you the moment I saw you, and you're the father of my child. I could never hate you for that."

"Wait, what?" he asked confused.

"What?"

"Did you just say I am the father of your child?" I nodded looking at him like he was crazy. "What child?"

"Uh, the one I'm carrying…?"

"Bella, are you telling me you are pregnant?"

"Didn't you know that? I thought that's why you were here. Didn't Alice tell you or Emmett when he went to get you in Oklahoma? Be the way, what were you doing in Oklahoma of all places?" I said quickly trying to see if he was lying about not knowing, or just didn't know.

He had no idea. "You're pregnant? With my child?"

"Well, who else's would it be?"

He clasped back onto the side of my truck. I've never seen him like this. His eyes were confused, but happy at the same time. He didn't know how to act. He didn't know what to say. "How… when…?"

"Well, you should know how," I said sheepishly, not wanting to talk about it, "and it happened about a week before you left. I found out maybe two weeks after you left. Something like that."

He bowed his head and closed his eyes. It looked like he was in pain. He seemed to be regretting everything that has happened the past three months. Probably the whole leaving thing is hurting him the most. "Hey, are you okay?" I whispered reaching out my hand to touch him, but then I pulled it back.

He looked up at me with hurt, sad eyes. "Bella," he whispered, "I'm so sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am right now. I can't believe I didn't realize it before I left this place. How could I have left you alone in a time like this? What's the matter with me?"

I walked over and leaned on my truck next to him. "Nothing is, Edward. You just didn't know. There is nothing you can do about it. You might have known, but just couldn't believe it because you have had this idea in your head for ninety-some years that this couldn't happen."

"I shouldn't have left. It was the worst decision of my life." He got up off my truck and turned to me. "Bella, you're probably thinking I'm only saying this because I found out about the baby, but that's not true. I wanted to come back here as soon as I left. I didn't feel whole. I never have, until I met you. I was just so worried for your safety that I thought I had to leave you alone, so you wouldn't be in danger. Then I found out Victoria was after you so I came back here to get her scent and track her. I ended up in South America, but then her trail just ended so I went back to where there was fork in the trial, which lead me to Oklahoma. The day I came back here I came to your house to see you. As soon as I saw you I almost jumped into your room again, like I used too. Bella, I can't live without you." He sighed and took a step closer to me. "I understand if you don't feel the same way about me, but I will be here. I'm not leaving you again. Never again will I leave you. I promise you that."

I looked up at him and sighed. I didn't know what to do. I still felt like I was dreaming, but my dreams never felt so real like this. My eyes were starting to tear up. "I have to go," I whispered as I got into my truck and turned it on. I looked out my review mirror to watch him stare after me as I left him. He just stood there seeming to understand I had to think about everything that just happened.

Most of the day went through in a blur once I got to school. I couldn't concentrate on anything. All I kept on thinking about were Edward's words to me, and if I should go to their house tonight, or if I should just bail out. I didn't know what to do; I mean they did _leave_ me. I know that they are back now, but that doesn't heal the heart that quick. I did need answers, however. Maybe I could go for a few minutes…

"Bella, are you okay? You seem very distracted today," Angela said to me at the lunch table as Ben sat down next to her.

I shook my head. "Yea, I'm fine, something just happened this morning that I was definitely not prepared for."

"Did Jacob finally tell you how he feels?" she asked taking a sip of her water.

I dropped my fork and stared at her. "What do you mean?"

"Oops. Never mind. I don't know what I was talking about," she said quickly.

"No, no tell me what you mean by he finally told me how he feels."

Ben sighed. "Whenever he would tag along with you he was just over protective. It seemed like he thought you may break if you took the wrong step and fell over."

"Also the way he looked at you sometimes, it just reminded me of how _he_ used to look at you," Angela said making sure not to say _his_ name for my sakes.

I laughed. Jacob didn't stare at me that way. No one could look at me the same way Edward did, well, _does. _Also Jacob was only over protective because he knew my secret. "Guys, he does not like me. We are just really good friends. We are like brother and sister. Besides, you know how I trip over my own feet. That's probably why he's over protective; I mean remember last year during Spring Break?"

"Bella, come on. You may be a klutz, but he helps you out of the car like you are his responsibility. Also like your carrying his child," Ben said chuckling. Angela joined in.

I forced a laugh because I knew my voice would betray me. Well, I wasn't carrying his, but someone else's. "Guys believe me. Jacob does not love me; he doesn't even like me that way."

Work never seemed to end. I stood at the counter for the most part and sometimes I would help point out people to the right section, or scan people's items. The nice part about it is it put off making a decision about the Cullens house. That was the only good part. Worrying about it wasn't the worst part.

I mean what would Edward do now after I just left him in the street after that great speech he made to me? Would he even look at me, or would he just regret coming back? Did he tell Alice and Emmett? Did they hate me too now?

When my shift was done and I got home to get ready to maybe go, a knock came to the door. My heart jumped at the thought of Edward coming back, but it fell when I opened up the door. "Jacob, what are you doing here?"

He sighed and looked down. "Can I come in Bella, please? I have to talk to you about everything."

"Look, I'm just about to head out, so I'll just come out," I said grabbing my sweat shirt and stepping outside onto my porch. "What is it?"

"Well first," he said looking into my eyes, "I'm really sorry about everything I said yesterday. I didn't mean to say everything that I did say. I just was so mad that you went there and forgave them as fast as you did. I mean after everything they put you through, you would just go to their house and forgive them because they are here now."

"Jacob, I didn't forgive them. Far from it actually," I said, my eyes started watering up again just thinking about Edward. "I went to their house because I was confused on how they could email me, and why they were back. I needed answers Jacob and I couldn't get them from you or anyone else." I paused and looked up at him. "They are my family Jake. Even if they left me, they are still my family. They protected me through so much. I had to see them and you know I had to too."

"No, Bella, I don't. You didn't have to see them at all if actually listened to your own words. You said 'I don't want them coming back just because I'm pregnant. I want them to come back for me.' Just because they are back doesn't mean you should forget all the words you said back then."

"I didn't! Didn't you hear anything I just said? I just said I never forgave them! Any of them for that matter! I walked out on two and drove away from one. You have no idea how hard that was to do, Jake, no idea! Don't judge me because you should look in the mirror mister."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked raising his voice.

"You are a hypocrite!" I scoffed at him. "Do you really not see how much you are alike them? You both should be mythical! I don't care if you are only around if they are because never of your kind should be walking this earth! It's illogical! Also, Jake, you told me you would never be like them. You said you would never hurt me, or leave me. Well, newsflash, you did both of them!"

"One, I didn't leave you. I was always here and you knew I couldn't tell you who I was! Two, how did I hurt you, Bella? I have always been here!"

"No, Jacob, you haven't! So, you couldn't tell me. That didn't mean you couldn't answer my calls or hang out with me. Edward said he couldn't tell me what he was, but he never ignored me." _Except for the first day I met him,_ I said to myself. "And you're hurting me right now! With your words, it's hurting me. So, you are just like them. Except you just can't see it," I said walking away from him. I couldn't stand him anymore. He was making me dizzy even before I started yelling at him.

I slammed my door shut and turned on it on. I was about to pull away before Jacob opened the door. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm going to see my family, and talk to them about everything that is happening to me," I said weakly. His hand was touching mine, and it didn't feel right.

"Bella, I can' t let you do that. They will hurt you again; I just know it, why can't you see it?" he screamed at me.

I put my free hand on my forehead and closed my eyes. I was going to pass out soon, I just know it. "Because… Jake… I'm… I'm…"

And everything went black.

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A/N: Ah cliff hanger! Oh no. Sorry guys, but if I continued on what I was about to say, it would go on for forever. I think I'll start typing up everything for the next chapter tonight, as well as some for my other stories. So the next chapter should be up in at least three days. At the latest, hopefully. Also please, please, vote on gender! Thanks guys, you're the best!


	6. Finding the Future

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter! I know what the gender is going to be now! So thank you for finally helping me out, you guys really voted for what you wanted there! Well enjoy this chapter.

July 26, 2008

I don't own anything, not even Monday Rain by Kate Voegele.

* * *

_It's the start of something brand new  
It's the start of the closing line  
With the door ed an inch or two  
Do I dare set my foot inside?  
Do I love you then lose you  
Or do I put my trust in time?  
Do I let myself refuse to count on a fateful dream of mine?_

"What did you do to her?" a deep musical voice said angrily.

"Me? I didn't do anything! I was just standing there with her and she just passed out! Don't blame anything on me, man. You have no right to blame me for anything that has happened to her," a huskier voice yelled back.

"You clearly weren't just standing there with her because then she wouldn't have passed out! Were you yelling at her because if you did I will break your jaw," another velvet voice said.

"Edward, Emmett, calm down. Bella mentioned something about Jacob to me. She said every time she is either around him or he is touching her she feels faint. She doesn't know what causes it, but that's probably what happened. Either you, Jacob, were too close to her or you were touching her," a pixie voice said.

"Well, what is it _mutt_?" the deeper voice said.

My eyes fluttered up open then. I couldn't even remember what happened. The last thing I remember was Jacob yelling at me, and him grabbing my hand. What were we arguing about again? I groaned, trying to sit up.

I felt a hand softly push me back down. It was cold, which made me relax. "Bella are you okay? What happened?" Edward asked kneeing beside the couch.

"I have no idea," I said weakly. Then I looked around to see who else was there. Alice, Edward, Emmett and Jacob were all staring at me. "Alice, don't you know what happened to me? I mean didn't you see anything?"

Edward's head turn so he could meet Alice's eyes. When he turned back to me it looked like he was going to kill someone, but probably not around me. "Are you okay love? Does anything hurt?"

I shook my head. "I'm fine, just dizzy."

"Okay, lay down. You're going to be okay, I promise," he whispered as he kissed the top of my forehead. He then stood up and turned to Jacob. "Outside, now."

I was going to watch them walk out to see what is going to happen, but Alice's head blocked my view. "Bella, you should know that _Jacob_ was yelling at you and grabbing you hand. The combination probably made you pass out."

I nodded. "I know. I remembered the part with Jacob yelling at me, I just don't remember anything else. Like where I was going or even what we were arguing about."

She sighed and sat down next to me. "You were arguing about see us. You wanted to come and talk to us and he didn't want you to because he was afraid we would hurt you when he did that himself."

"What do you mean?"

"Bella, he made you pass out. I really think you should try and refrain from seeing him. I mean it's just going to get worse each time, and next time it happens it could hurt the baby. We're all going to have to be extra careful with you because this has never happened before."

I groaned again. "You know I can't do that, Alice. He's been with me through this whole experience and I just can't abandon him like that. He just won't touch me again. That way I won't actually faint," I said giving a weak smile, while I tried to sit up.

Emmett pushed me back into the couch. "Bella really, will you try to just lie down for a little while? Edward needs to talk to you still and you will probably fall over if you try to stand up." He paused. "I would love to see you fall though. I haven't gotten a good laugh like that in awhile."

"Thanks Emmett, but if I fall you know Edward will kill you for letting me up."

"True," he said flatly.

The front door opened and Edward came swiftly to my side. "Are you feeling any better, love?"

I nodded. "Edward, I'm fine. I need to talk to Jacob, however."

He shook his head. "That's out of the question. We came to a compromise. You two can talk on the phone as much as you want, but he cannot come near you. He was just as worried as I was about you fainting like that. That should never happen again."

"You can't be serious."

"About what?"

"Jacob and I _just_ talking on the phone. We're going to have to see each other some time. He will probably want to take me to my appointments or something. Also Charlie will be wondering why we aren't always together anymore. It just won't work."

"Bella, please understand where I'm coming from. You aren't just worrying about yourself anymore. You are in charge of another life now. This could be harmful to the baby," he said softly stroking my hair.

"I do understand where you are coming from," I said sighing. "I just think it's going too hard to not see him anymore. I mean he was there for me when no one else was. He went to my first doctor's appointment, and everyone since. It's just going to be weird."

He looked down at the floor. "I should have been there with you. I don't know what I was thinking, leaving you. I should have known. I should have stayed with you."

I lifted up his chin so I could look at him in his topaz eyes. "Yes, you probably should have. It doesn't matter now, however, because you're here now. That's all that matters to me. You will be here with me through the rest of it. I won't be alone."

He kissed me palm. "I'm so sorry, love. I promise I will never leave you again, even if you want me too," he said chuckling.

"That won't happen," I said smiling.

_Within me  
It tugs on_

_My heartstrings  
And I know  
It's just a sky of silver gray  
Just a narrow passageway  
Just a song cut off halfway  
Just another Monday rain_

He got up and kissed me softly on the lips. I wanted to push myself into him, but he made that next to impossible. This is what I wanted. Nothing else but this moment right now. I haven't felt this alive since he left, and now I feel amazing. I feel like I could do this whole mothering thing. I felt like I would be able to care for it and be there for it when it grows up.

He pulled away to allow me to breathe, even though I didn't want to. Then he kissed the top of my head and whispered, "I love you. I have never stopped loving you and I never will."

"I love you too," I said softly.

Alice and Emmett came back into the room then. I didn't even realize they left us. Edward sat down on the floor next to my head on the couch. Emmett joined him and smiled at me as he sat down. Alice, however, stood up in the middle of the room all business like.

"Okay, well, Carlisle is coming back tomorrow and wants to have a check up with you to see what's all going on. Also tomorrow Esme and I are going to get the baby's room ready!" Alice said jumping up and down at the thought of getting the nursery ready.

I gave her a sideways glance. Did this mean I was going to live with them? Edward seemed to read my mind, even though he can't. "Bella, we all want you to move in with us. You were already part of the family before we left and now…"

"Rose and I are going to be aunts, and Emmett and Jasper are going to be uncles! It's so exciting," Alice exclaimed almost too fast for me to understand.

I looked blankly at them. Of course I wanted to move in with them, but this seemed too fast for me. "Uh, can I talk to Edward, alone?" Emmett and Alice nodded and left the room. I then turned my attention to Edward. "I'm not so sure about this."

"What do you mean," he asked narrowing his eyes.

"I want to move in with you guys, I just don't know if I'm ready for that yet. I mean you guys have only been back for a day."

"Not true. Alice and Emmett have been back for a week now. It's not their fault you just don't read your email," he said teasing me.

I smiled. "You know what I mean Edward. This is just going too fast for me. I would love to move in with you sometime, just not now."

He dropped his head and then smiled as he looked up at me. "I understand Bella. It wasn't right for us to ambush you like t hat. I am sorry, but we are still going to fix up a room for the baby. You can come over and see it tomorrow if you like."

"I would love too. Are you sure you don't mind me not moving in with you?"

"I'm positive. I'm just happy you forgave me. I don't know what I would have done if you didn't. Though I would like you to move in before the baby is born."

"That won't be a problem," I said softly as he kissed me once more.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I was sitting on the couch with Edward later that day. Alice and Emmett left to give us some time alone, and to start getting things ready for me to move in whenever I did. We were watching _Sleeping with the Enemy_. I had my head on his lap and he was stroking me hair.

"Bella," Charlie called as he came into the house. "Are you… What are you doing here?"

I sat up and looked over to Charlie to see what he was staring at. He was staring a t Edward, of course, and didn't look happy about seeing him. "Dad I can explain."

"I didn't ask you too. What are you doing in my house Cullen?"

Edward stood up and looked at him completely calm. "Sir, I came back with my family today. I came over this morning to apologize for leaving her whenever I still loved her. When I started to talk to her I noticed she was pregnant. Charlie, I would have never left her if I knew that she was carrying my child. I'm not that kind of guy, but if you don't want me to see her then I won't as long as that's what she wants. But, I will never stop supporting her and _our_ child. I will never leave her again. If she moves then I will move because a child needs a mother and a father in their life somehow."

I stared at him in complete awe at that moment. That was the best speech I ever heard him make. That includes the one he made to me earlier. He said he would stay by me no matter what. I don't know of any guy (werewolves included) who would do that. Most people would say that but never mean it. The way Edward said it; you could tell he meant every word and will never go back on it.

Charlie stared at him in shock. I don't think he thought that would come out of Edward's mouth at all. "I don't like you right now Edward."

"I don't like myself that much either at the moment," he said seriously. Well I loved him…

Charlie nodded. "As long as you take care of my daughter and my grandchild then I will support you two. But, if you ever, ever, hurt her again I will not let you come within ten feet of her and the child. I'm serious. I cannot see her that sad as she was earlier this year."

He nodded. "Believe me, I don't want that either. I promise you, Charlie, I will never hurt her again for all of my existent." Which was saying something, but Charlie didn't really know that…

Charlie then looked to me and his expression softened. "Bella, do you still love him? Or do you just want the father by your side because you know that's no way to begin a relationship again."

I looked at Edward and then I looked at Charlie. "Dad I love him. I never stopped."

He nodded. "Okay, then Edward you have my blessing with her. Are you going to moving in her with her or is she going to move in with your family. You know for the baby."

Edward sighed and looked down. I knew he want the second one to be the answer, but we both knew it wasn't what I wanted. "Bella wants to stay here for awhile because I'm just coming back and she doesn't want it to move too fast. I understand completely, but Alice and Esme are getting a nursery ready for her."

"Yes, I decided that I would keep living here for awhile and then I would move in with the Cullens," I said looking down at the floor.

"I think that is a good idea Bella. It's good that you aren't trying to rush things here."

And like that I got my father's blessing and the support I needed.

Later that day when I was making myself a sandwich and after Edward left to make the appearance that he had to unpack; Charlie came into the kitchen looking grave. "Bella, can I talk to you for a second about this whole thing?"

I put my sandwich down and swallowed. "Dad, I thought we already talked about it with Edward. Did you like change your mind or something?"

He shook his head. "No, no I didn't, but I have to talk to you about something that relating to it."

"Oh, sure. What's going on then?"

He walked over and took a seat next to me. "Bells, I'm worried that now that Edward is back in your life that you won't have time for Jacob. I don't want you to lose a guy like that. He was such a good friend to you whenever you just found out and he was always there for you."

_Not entirely._ "Dad, I will never forget how Jacob was with me. You know I will try to talk to him as much as I can, but he may not be over there as much, but I will still talk to him on the phone and stuff like that. You know I could never forget what he has done for me," I said putting my hand over my stomach.

He nodded. "I know I just want to make sure that you are okay and that you don't ruin your friendship with Jacob because Edward is back here for you."

"I promise, I won't ruin my friendship." _Well, at least I hope so._

"You're a good girl Bella. I'm proud of you," he said smiling at me.

"Thanks dad. I think I'm going to go upstairs and take a nap or something. It's been a long day for me," I said getting up and heading upstairs. When I got there I looked to the corner to see Edward, smiling, sitting in my rocking chair. "What are you doing here?" I asked smiling.

He held his arms open for me, and I went and sat on his lap. "I wanted to spend as much time with you as I can. I missed you terribly, love."

I smiled and closed my eyes while I leaned my head against his chest. "I missed you too."

"Are you tired?" I nodded. "Okay, I'm going to move you to your bed. I think you will be more comfortable there, also you will be warmer. I don't want you being cold right now."

"No, I'm fine here."

"I won't leave you. I will lay with you if you want me too." I nodded again. I heard him chuckling as he placed me onto my bed.

I rolled on my back and he lay down beside me. Then he put his hand over my stomach and sighed. "Can you feel it move at all?"

"Sometimes," I said softly. "I can't feel it kick, but whenever I was around the wolves it would move constantly, but whenever I'm around you guys it is very calm. It's very odd, but soothing sometimes."

He laughed. "Well we definitely know who the baby will take after. So have you thought of any names?"

"I don't even know what the sex of it is yet."

"Neither do I. I made sure that I blocked out as much of Alice's mind as I could. She didn't tell anyone else yet because she did want me to know until I got to talk to you about it. Now what do you think for a boy?" he asked smiling.

I sighed, but smiled. I actually thought of some names. "I was thinking Eden, Aaron, Nathan or Nathaniel, or Erik." I turned my head and saw him smiling. "Why are you smiling like that?"

He kissed me on the top of my head. "I love how much thought you put into this already. Now what about a girl?"

I kept my eyes on him. "Well, maybe Olivia, Melody, Mariana, Nadia, or Elizabeth," I said smiling sheepishly.

He looked shocked. "You would name our child after my mother?" I nodded. "Bella, you never even knew that I would be coming back for sure. Were you still going to name her that?"

"Yes. Edward, you were always a part of my. You took parts of my heart with you. I had to have something to remind me of you even if I would never see you again. I thought of what Carlisle told me that night everything went wrong. I thought about what he told me about you and what you told me. I thought it would be nice if we had a little baby girl named Elizabeth Alice Mason Cullens. Then I thought about what if we didn't have a girl. So then I thought it would be nice if we had a baby boy named Eden something Cullens. I couldn't think of a middle name for the boy."

He smiled. "I love the names you picked out. You have great tastes in names," he said brushing a piece of hair out of my face. "Now sleep my love. Rest because tomorrow you will see the nursery Alice and Esme are finishing as we speak."

I giggled and turned to my side so I could get comfortable. Edward wrapped his arms around me and hummed _my lullaby_ in my ear. Before I knew, I feel asleep in the man I love arms.

The next morning I woke up to Alice shaking me like a madwoman. "Bella, wake up! You have to see the baby's room! It's perfect for you! Hurry up and get ready! Edward is downstairs waiting for you to get up. He wouldn't wake you up, but I wanted to. So hurry up!" she yelled jumping off my bed and running to my door.

I sighed and rolled back over. I did want to see the baby's room and all, but just not at the moment. I think I feel back to sleep because the next thing I know is Edward is kissing my cheek. "Bella, love, it's time to get up. Alice is already bouncing off the walls."

I groaned and sat up. "Can't we go at like noon?"

He smiled and looked at his watch. "Its 11:30, love. So by the time you get ready it will be noon."

I sighed and got up out of bed. I was about to head of the shower before he grabbed my hand and pulled me to him. I smiled as he kissed my lips gently before letting me go. I felt dizzy from the kiss, but not the bad dizziness I felt around Jacob. I felt the kind of dizziness he always made me feel whenever he dazzled me like he does.

Right when Edward said we were heading to the Cullens house to see the nursery. I didn't know what to expect, and I'm not talking about the room. I knew that would be over the top. I was just wondering what the rest of them would think of me. Alice, Emmett, and Edward were so excited. I had a feeling Esme and Carlisle would be too, but what about Jasper and Rosalie. Rosalie would probably just hate me even more, but Jasper might be too afraid to be around me. I mean after everything that happened.

What if I split up the family because Jasper was afraid of what might happen if he came by me? I couldn't let that happen. If it comes to that maybe Edward and I could move away together, but we could always come and visit them. I just would tear up their family because someone was afraid of killing me if I step in the room.

When we pulled up to their house I didn't even have time to reach for the door handle before Edward opened the door for me. I smiled at him as he helped me out of the car. "Edward, I'm pregnant, not elderly." **(A/N: a quote from One Tree Hill season 4)**

He chuckled at me. "Well I just want to make sure that nothing happens to you. I mean we are talking about you, the girl who is incapable of walking across a flat, stable surface without tripping. I have a right to be cautious."

I rolled my eyes as he opened the front door. Everyone, including Rosalie and Jasper, were standing in the foyer to greet me. I brushed with embarrassment for having everyone coming to meet me. Edward squeezed my hand.

Esme came up to me and hugged me. "Bella, you have no idea how much I missed you! Also you have no idea what kind of gift you gave me. I never thought this would happen. Never in a million years, but yet it has and I couldn't be happier for you two."

"Thank you Esme. I missed you too," I said hugging her back. She was like a mother to me. It was hard to think that she didn't want me anymore then Edward did. Thankfully it was all a lie…

Carlisle stepped up and next and hugged me as well. "Bella, you had me speechless when I heard the news. If you don't mind I would like to have a check-up with you to make sure everything is going as it should be."

I nodded and hugged him back. Alice and Emmett hugged me, but didn't say anything. They just smiled at me considering we already had a long discussion together. Then Jasper nodded to me and told me he was happy I was okay and that I was back with his family. Rosalie tried to smile, but she didn't do very well at it. Emmett nudged her, but she didn't do any more than a half smile and a nod.

I saw Edward roll his eyes a little at her, and heard him growl lowly to her too. I suddenly felt like they may get into a fight with one another right here in the middle of everyone. Thankfully Alice hurried to my side. "Come on Bella, it's time to see the room!" she said grabbing my hand and pulling me up the stairs with Esme at my side and Edward behind me.

When we all got to the door she paused and took a key out of her back pocket. "I locked it for two reasons. Just in case you didn't want to see it, but Edward said you wanted too. Also so that Emmett wouldn't bother us while we were painting it. Don't ask, it was a long story," Alice said glaring at Emmett, who showed up behind us.

"Hey, Jasper thought it was funny too," he said raising his hands into the air defensively. "Now can we please see the room?"

I laughed at him and nodded for Alice to open it up. Edward took my hand to his lips and kissed it and dropped them to our sides, still intertwined. When Alice opened the door the first thing I noticed was the color.

Everything in the room was covered in pink…

* * *

A/N: I know! I can't believe it either, but you guys voted for it. Sorry to everyone who voted for a boy, but it was a close race until the last chapter… Well tell me if you like the idea of naming the baby Elizabeth after Edward's mother! Also tell me what you thought of the chapter. I rewrote it twice, not sure if I liked it…


	7. Goodbyes Forever

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry it took me so long to update. Soccer started up and it's slowly controlling my life again. Also school is starting on Wednesday, joy, so I've been getting ready for my sophomore year of high school. Fun. Well enjoy this chapter, it may be awhile before I update next… sorry. By the way, this will not be like the Breaking Dawn version.

August 24, 2008

I don't own anything, still.

* * *

Pink, everything was pink. From the crib, to the changing table, to the dresser. My eyes grew wide as I walked into the room. There was one thing that stood out in the room and that was a rocking chair. It looked exactly like the one I had in my room back at Charlie's house. How did they get that?

I walked over to where the rocking chair was, not noticing the room was bigger, but the other room wasn't pink. It was blue. Wait, that can't be right. How can one side of the room be pink and the other side be blue? Unless…

"Alice," I said my voice a little shaky, "why is half the room pink and the other half blue?"

Alice smiled at me and skipped over to me and put her arm around my shoulder, I didn't even notice Edward was no longer at my side. "Because, silly, you're having twins."

I turned around to where Edward and Emmett were standing. Clearly Edward knew, but Emmett seemed just as shocked as I was. "Did you know?" I asked Edward.

He nodded. "Of course I knew, love. Once Alice found out she couldn't keep her thoughts to herself," he said with a half smile. "We agreed to not tell anyone else until you found out for yourself."

I turned back to Alice. "How is this possible? I mean my doctor didn't even know!"

"I know that, she was going to find out in your next appointment. She didn't look well enough to see it in your earlier check-ups." **(A/N: just go with me here)**. "She didn't seem like the best doctor."

I heard someone coming up behind me. Edward put his arms around me and put his chin on my shoulder. "Are you okay, love? I know this is a lot to handle, but everything will be okay, I promise. I won't let anything happen to you or _our_ children."

No matter how much I wanted to tell him I wasn't okay with everything that was happening to me, I couldn't. I felt so safe in his arms, I felt like I would be okay as long as he was here with me. And the way he said _our children_ it sounded like a song. This is what I wanted with him. I wanted a family, and that's what I'm getting.

I just nodded, not trusting my voice, and closed my eyes. I was going to have a daughter and a son. Wow, who would have thought?

"I can't believe you guys didn't tell anyone! Do you know how shocked everyone is going to be?" Emmett said coming up to Edward, Alice and I.

"Emmett, we just thought it would be nice for Bella to know something before everyone else knew. I mean you guys all knew she was having a girl before she did, so I thought that it would be a nice surprise to everyone, minus Edward, to find out that she was also having a boy the same time she did," Alice said.

Emmett chuckled, and stepped back a little. He seemed a little too shocked. "I wonder how everyone will react."

We all knew he wasn't talking about everyone. He was simply talking about Rosalie. She was probably furious that I would get everything she wanted, plus more. After this no matter what I do, she will hate me. I will have everything that she wanted, with a man as beautiful as her husband.

"They will just have to deal," Edward said quietly.

I sighed, deeply, and turned into Edward chest. He wrapped his arms around me and rocked back and forth. He started to hum my lullaby and stroking my hair. I felt so relaxed with him. I never felt this way with Jacob, even before he was a werewolf. Jacob was like my brother, we could laugh and have a good time, but he never made me feel calm and relaxed the way Edward did.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Edward asked me.

I realized that tears were falling from my eyes. When did I start crying? "I don't know, actually. I guess I just realized that you're really here, and how I feel with you. I haven't felt this way in a long time it seems like."

He smiled at me and pulled me over to the rocking chair. "I know what you mean," he said wiping a tear from my eye. "I'm so sorry about that. I feel like I should have been there for your first check-up. I should have been there the whole time. Bella-"

"Edward," I said interrupting him, "enough with the apologies. It's in the past. I forgive you, and I just want to let it go. I love you and I know you're never going to leave me, and that's all I need."

"Don't forget, I will _never_ leave you. I can't do that to you again. Knowing that I hurt you is too much for me. I couldn't live with myself much longer knowing what I did to you. I would have came back even if Emmett didn't come and find me. I couldn't stay away much longer."

I smiled and was about to say something before the door burst open. "You're _dog_ is here demanding to speak to you," Alice said bitterly. "I couldn't come up here and warn you even because I couldn't see him!"

I heard a low growl come from Edward as he helped me up. "Bella, can you do something for me?"

"That depends on what it is."

He sighed realizing I was coming downstairs with him no matter what. "Never mind. Please just stay behind me then. I can't have him come near you and hurt you again."

"Well what does he want?" I asked as Edward put his arm around my waist and ushered me out of the nursery.

"He just wants to talk to you. He wants to make sure you are okay, and tell you he's sorry."

"I can do that without your help _leech_," Jacob said through his teeth.

Edward looked up at him and pushed me gently behind him. "Please stay there," he said only to me. "Jacob, you shouldn't have come here."

"I didn't want to come here, but I had to talk to Bella, and since she wasn't home I assumed she was here with _you_." He paused and searched the room for me, when he saw me behind Edward he rolled his eyes. "You don't have to do that. I won't hurt her."

"Sorry, but you no longer have my trust. You've hurt her once-"

"By accident!"

"-and I can't let that happen again. She's not just carrying a child, she's carrying _two_."

Jacob stammered back a little. I looked around the room to see everyone was there. Carlisle and Edward were the closes to Jacob, and the rest were a little further back. I looked back to Jacob and he was staring at me with a hurt expression. "Is this true Bella?"

I nodded. "Yes, I just found out today."

"Bella, I'm so sorry I hurt you and yelled at you. You know I didn't mean to hurt you and I shouldn't have yelled at you. I just didn't want to see you go through the same thing all over again with these _bloodsuckers_," he said narrowing his eyes. He then took a step closer to Edward and I, which made Edward push me up against his body. Jacob rolled his eyes. "Look, I'm not going to hurt her. I've controlled myself." Edward didn't care. "Bella," he said sighing, "you don't have to be with _him_ just because of this baby. You can still be with me and the pack."

"That's impossible _mutt_. Have you forgotten she can't be in the room with you without feeling faint?" Emmett said through his teeth.

"I know that!" Jacob said raising his voice. "I'm just saying we could just talk on the phone. We can get together after the _babies_ come. You still have a choice, Bella. Don't make one you're going to regret."

I buried my face in Edward's back. I had to tell him how I felt. I knew that. This was probably the only chance I would get. I kissed Edward's back, and then moved around. I felt him tense as I brushed past him. I could feel everyone staring at me as I walked slowly up to Jacob, who was standing there in shock.

I took my hands in his and took a deep breath. "Jacob, I can't. It wouldn't be fair to you. I don't love you the way I love Edward. I have to stay with him because with him I feel whole. Without him I feel like I'm missing something so important to me I can't go on without it. Don't get me wrong, though. I _do_ love you Jacob, but I'm not _in_ love with you. I'm sorry."

I took another breath and move backwards because I couldn't stand being close to him much longer. Edward came up behind me and put his arms around me again. I put my arms around myself also and looked down at my stomach. I realized it was bigger than it probably should be for just one baby growing inside of me.

I looked back up to Jacob, who was standing there staring at me. I thought he might react badly, but I knew no one would let him get close to me or Edward. He didn't say anything, however. He just turned around and ran out the door.

I felt terrible. I let out the breath I was holding for what seemed like hours, and turned into Edward's chest. He tightened up his arms and held me. Then he picked me up and took me to his Volvo.

"Where are we going?" I asked as tears fell from my eyes.

"Back to your house. You've had a long day, you need your rest," he said softly as he pulled out of his driveway.

"But didn't Carlisle want to check up on me and the babies?"

He shook his head. "No, he can do that tomorrow. You really need some sleep. It's been an eventful day. Maybe too eventful for you."

I rolled my eyes at him as I sniffled. "Edward, I'm fine. I just don't think I should have told Jacob in front of everyone. He's probably really embarrassed. That just wasn't fair to him at all. I feel terrible."

"Bella, love, you had no other time to do it. You know I wouldn't have let you see him in person without me there with you. Even though Emmett enjoyed a little more than everyone else. You did the right thing, love. You shouldn't feel _terrible_."

I gave him a half smile. He smiled back at me and wiped a tear from my eye as he stopped the car. He then helped me out of the car and kissed me on the lips. "I would help you to your room, but I'm going to make the appearance that I'm dropping you off for the night. Besides Charlie would like to have you to himself this evening."

"Why?" I asked a little worried.

"He wants you to explain everything about the baby's room," he said teasingly. "You probably shouldn't tell him everything, however. That may raise some questions."

I rolled my eyes. "So nothing about me and you?"

He shook his head. "At least not at the moment. It may change once he sees me walking you up to the door to make sure you're okay."

"Edward, you really don't have to. I mean it's not like I'm going to go into labor from here to the door," I said making fun of his over protectiveness.

"Bella, I don't know if you will or won't! No one in my family has ever seen anything like this before. This has never happened to anyone I've talked to in my life. I just want to make sure nothing happens to you," he said taking my hand in his.

I sighed knowing he was absolutely right about this one. Couldn't I be right just once?

He turned and started to walk up to my front door. He walked as slow as me which once nice because I normally had to keep up with him. He stopped at the front door as I opened it, then he turn me to him and kissed me on the lips. "I'll be back later," he whispered in my ear.

I smiled up at him and waved to him as he left. Then I sighed and walked inside. "Hey dad. What's up?"

Charlie looked up from whatever game was on and then turned it to mute. "Bella, sit down."

I looked at him nervously and then remembered what Edward said. So I sat down on the couch across from him and took off my jacket. "Okay, I'm sitting, so tell me what's up."

"Well, tell me about the baby's nursery at the Cullen's," he said calmly.

I started telling bits and pieces of the nursery scene, trying not to give away too much information. I really couldn't deal with all those questions right now. Speaking of which, will I have to explain that soon?

After I told him everything I possibly could, we sat in silence until I got hungry. Then I got up to make myself something to eat and went up to my room. Edward still hadn't come back yet, but I could always read my email and tell Renee the news.

When I looked at my emails I was surprised to find no new ones. _Renee must not have been that worried about me,_ I thought to myself as I clicked on COMPOSE A MESSAGE.

_Dear Mom,_

_I thought I should tell you I found out some exciting news when I got my check up. I'm actually having twins. One boy and one girl! I was so shocked when he told me. And yes, I sort of have a new doctor, Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I bet you never thought that would happen. Edward and his family came back! I know what you're thinking, they must have found out and came back because of that. Actually only Alice and Emmett knew at first, whenever Edward came he had no idea! He came and apologized and actually found out that I was pregnant by looking at me. I'm going to be so fat… Well I'm going to make us some food._

_Love, Bella_

Once I hit send and closed out of my email I found myself clicking on the internet icon. Then I made my way over to the search button and found myself typing in _Vampires_ for the second time in my life.

Old tales came up and the site that I had already read, but nothing on vampire pregnancies. Maybe I should look that up…

"Bella," Edward's voice came from behind me making me jump a foot into the air, "what are you doing?"

I gulped and turned around to meet his curious stare. "Um, I was just emailing Renee, and then I found myself looking up some stuff on the internet."

"What kind of 'stuff'?"

He already knew. I sighed. "Fine, I was looking up searches for vampires to see if anyone wrote anything about vampire pregnancies or someone getting pregnant from a vampire."

Edward chuckled softly. "You don't think I already did that?" I gave him a quizzical stare. "Love, I've looked up everything I could possibly think of on this subject. My whole family, excluding Rosalie, has tried to find some sort of explanation for this." He picked me up off my chair at the computer and carried me over to my bed. "It's very frustrating not finding anything about this, but many myths about us."

I looked down at my hand, and his one arm gave me a squeeze on my back. "Bella, what's wrong?"

"What are they going to be when they come… _out_? What are we going to tell Charlie if they don't come out human? Edward, I don't know what I'm going to do," I whispered leaning my head onto his shoulder.

He kissed the top of my head. I didn't need to look up to know his eyes would be worried about me. "I promise you, _we_ will be just fine. I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you. And if they don't come out… _human_, then we will figure it out. I'm not leaving you to decide all this on your own. I'll always be here."

"I know you will."

* * *

A/N: Yay! I hope you guys liked my little twist in there. I sort of shocked myself when I started typing it out. Well I think I'm going to start typing the next chapter tonight, but I probably won't finish it, so it still may be awhile. Sorry 'bout that.


	8. Choices and Conclusions

A/N: AHH sorry, sorry, sorry. I know it has taken me forever to update my stories, but soccer took over and now basketball, so I pretty much don't exist to anyone! Lol. Sorry. Maybe one chapter of Second Chance too if I can finish it…

October 26, 2008

I don't own anything.

* * *

**Edward's POV**

I looked down at the angel in my arms, sleeping. I smiled as she twitched a little. My eyes grazed down her fragile body. My eyes rested on her belly where a small bump was. I placed my left hand on it. When I did this her hand moved right over mine. I looked over to her as her eyes opened up, but then closed again. A silent smile spread across her lips. I sighed.

Suddenly something nudged my hand. My attention went right to her belly. The twins. I smiled an overjoyed smile. That was the first time I felt them. I was finally starting to feel like a father.

Wow, a father. I was actually going to have a family, but not with just anyone, with the love of my life, no my existence. Never would I have imagined she would have loved me the way she does. I still don't know if I can believe that someone as beautiful and selfless as her would ever love a monster like me.

"Edward," my angel murmured, "I love you."

I almost answered her, but I feared I would wake her up. Besides I enjoyed this silence to just gaze at her. Every time I looked at her, I became mesmerized. She was carrying _my children_.

Children. Another strange word. Were we even making the right choice with this? Who knows what will happen to the babies? Who knows what they are becoming? What am I doing? I know that I'm a monster. I've know that, but what about my children? Will they be monsters like me, or will they be human like their mother?

A voice in my head was praying for human, but another wanted them to be monsters. Why was that?

Well, for one reason, if they are monsters like me, I won't have to watch them die. I could not bear seeing die. It would be as bad as losing my angel. _But _if they are monsters _she_ is going to insist on becoming one as well. Do I still want that for her?

I've never wanted her to be one of my kind, but if our children were like me, she would have to be one. I knew that, and that scared me and frustrated me. I didn't want to take her life and future away from her.

Maybe I should have just stayed in Alaska when I went there a year ago.

That would have been the selfless thing to do. Of course she had to fall in love with me, the most selfish monster on the Earth. It wasn't fair to her. I wanted her and that's all I cared about.

I looked back down at her and kissed her on her head. Then I got up and looked around her room. I've been back for three days now, yet I still haven't looked around to see any changes she might have made while I was away. All I wanted to do was be with her, hold her and protect her. She deserved all of my attention.

I looked to the corner of her room where her rocking chair used to be now it was just an empty spot. I felt the need to fill it with something. I'll have to tell Alice to fill it later.

My eyes wondered away from the chair and to the broken stereo on the floor. I should have known that birthday present would get destroyed after my family and I left. I just had no idea it would look like _that_!

I shrugged it off making a mental not to repair it. I looked over to my sleeping angel for a second and then moved on to her closet. When I walked in I almost tripped over a small box. A shoe box, actually. That was never there before…

I picked it up and slouched to the floor. The box was labeled EDWARD. As my curiosity rose, I began to wonder why she had a shoe box with my name on it. I quickly opened it find many items in it. The first thing I noticed was the blue blouse she wore at Port Angeles, stuffed in the corner. Another big item in there was a book, Sense and Sensibility. I sighed knowing it was in there because the hero was named Edward. I then started to pick out smaller objects. The flower I put in her hair one sunny day at our meadow during the summer, the note I wrote her last year saying _Be Safe_, lyrics to the first song we danced to, Collide by Howie Day, and lastly a picture of _our _babies. How the doctor missed the one, I will never understand. I turned it over to see that she wrote on it. _Little baby Cullen, September 10_. The day it was conceived. I smiled at the sonogram, hopeful.

Hopeful that maybe they could be both human and a monster. That way neither of us would suffer. That way we could live like a family. I could no longer deny Alice's vision. She would have to become a monster.

Sighing, I placed everything into the box and putting it back into its rightful spot. Then I made my way back over to the bed and sat down at her feet. I looked at her and groaned internally. Tomorrow she would have to go to school. Alice and I won't register for awhile still. Maybe I could persuade her to stay…

I couldn't let her out of my sight again without going crazy. Three months away from her was way too long for me. Look, I'm only thinking of myself again. She was probably miserable all by herself, scared even. She found out she was responsible for another life without me there, and I'm worrying about my own pain. How could she love such a selfish monster?

I looked over to her once again and saw her shiver. I chuckled softly as I got up to close the window she always kept open for me. Then I walked out into the linen closet to get her a blanket. Before I went back to her room I went downstairs to get a glass of water for her, but stopped before I could make it to the kitchen. I walked over to the coffee table where a picture frame was. _That wasn't there before,_ I thought. I picked it up and studied the picture of _my_ angel and that _dog_ laughing. She was on his back with her arms wrapped a tightly around his neck. How didn't I notice this before?

It wasn't taken that long ago because you could see that her cheeks were plumper. Well at least a vampire could tell. And only a vampire could see the faintness in her figure being that close to him. Now why was that?

I quickly shook it off and put the picture back down. When I returned to her room, she was awake and sitting up looking worried. I walked over to her and put the blanket around her shoulders and kissed the top of her head.

"What's wrong love," I asked softly.

She leaned into my shoulder as I wrapped my arms around her. "I was afraid you left again."

I felt so guilty. How could I be so caress to just leave her like that? I'm such a fool. "I'm so sorry love. I went to get you a blanket because you looked cold."

She nodded slowly in my chest. I picked up my arm off her shoulder and put my fingers under her chin and lifted her delicate head up so I could look her in the eyes. "I will never leave you again. I promise you that. I'm too selfish to live without you. I can't be through that much pain again without going crazy."

She smiled as I kissed her softly on the lips. Then I laid down with her close to my chest and sung her back to sleep. Only this time I didn't stop singing. I just kept humming and singing her lullaby, but half way through the night I went into a whole other key and started humming new notes.

I soon realized I was making up the twins lullaby. This is what I will sing for my children when they can't sleep, or just need to be calmed down. This will put a smile on Esme's face when I'm at my piano later. I put my hand on her belly once more and I could feel a nudge once in awhile as I hummed softly. Bella will love this.

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**Bella's POV**

Sleeping in his arms was like nothing else. None of my nightmares came, only the sweet scent of his skin filled my mind. Which was just the way I wanted it to be.

When I woke up with his arms wrapped tightly around my torso, I couldn't help but smile. I struggled to roll over to face him because of his arms, but her loosened them once he figured out what I was trying to do.

"Good morning love,'' he whispered kissing me softly.

"Good morning," I said dizzily.

He chuckled as he got up. Even though I tried to pull her back down, which didn't faze him; he stood up and walked to the side of the bed to help me up. "Do you really need to go to school today?" I shook my head smiling. "Good because Carlisle would like to check on the twins."

I groaned, slowly getting up out of my comfortable bed. That is until a wave of morning sickness came and I rushed to the bathroom. Edward was right behind me holding back my hair for me.

"Bella, are you alright?" he asked whipping my forehead off as I leaned against the bathroom wall.

I nodded silently and closed my eyes. I never thought being pregnant would be _this_ hard. Then slowly I got up, well tried to get up, but Edward, as soon as he saw me move, and helped me up. Then he carried me to my truck and drove off to his house for my check up.

"And how are you today Bella?" Carlisle asked me as he walked into his office that he has now turned into a hospital room exactly like my doctor's room.

"pretty good," I said smiling.

"Well, that's good. Now let me just make sure the twins are feeling just as well as you are."

He started to push down on my stomach and then he setup the ultrasound for me.

After it was all done he wrote down a few things and Edward squeezed my head. "Now Bella, are you feeling tired easily? Like does it feel like energy is just being drained out of you?"

"Yea, sort of."

"Like whenever you have done something?"

I shook my head. "More like just getting out of bed is draining the energy out of me. Why, is something wrong with that?"

Carlisle wrote something else down, and it made Edward sigh and whisper no. I hate these silent conversations. "Well normally pregnancy will drain the energy out of people, but I'm more concerned than I should be. It's just that I've never seen this with a vampire and a human. I just want to make sure nothing goes wrong," Carlisle said looking from Edward to me.

"I know that and I really appreciate you taking extra care, but I'm fine, really. The only things that are different is gaining weight, morning sickness, and the weird feeling around some mythical creatures," I said trying to make a joke of it. Edward, however, just didn't give in.

"Bella," Edward said turning to look at me," don't you understand you are carrying monsters in your womb? These children will never be normal. Why aren't you seeing this clearly?"

I looked at him with shock, but I slowly come to the understanding of what he was saying, well maybe. He might be repeating what my doctor said about 'options' or he may just be trying to protect me about what my babies may become. "Edward, what are you trying to say?"

He sighed and looked down at the floor like he was ashamed of himself. "I'm saying that maybe it's not the best idea to go through with this."

I quickly looked away from him. "By this, do you mean the pregnancy?"

"yes," he whispered.

At that moment I wanted to slap him, but I knew it would do nothing. Thought as quickly as I came up with that bad idea, it went away. I understood why he didn't want to go through with it. He thought that the babies were going to kill me. But I knew they would do such a thing. Not my Elizabeth and baby-no-name. Maybe he just didn't want to go through with it.

I took a deep breath and looked at him again. "Edward, you don't have to see me like this then. You don't need to go through with this, but I do."

He quickly took my hands and held them tightly. "Bella, I'm not leaving you. I'm too selfish to leave you again. Don't you see that yet?" H paused and looked towards the door. I hadn't even noticed that Carlisle left. "Bella, I want to go through the whole pregnancy experience with you, I really do. I'm just afraid of what the babies may do to you. I can't lose you."

I smiled weakly at him. "they won't hurt me. I know they won't. They love me as much as I love them. Edward, trust me, I can tell that this will be okay. That I will be okay. That the babies will be okay. And that you will make an excellent father.

He smiled my favorite smile crooked smile, but it didn't' reach his eyes. "You will make an excellent mother, love. The twins are lucky to have you as a mother, but not so much me as a father."

I rolled my eyes and he chuckled. "But we will make a fine team. After all opposites attach, love," Edward aid with a wicked grin. Then he kissed me with a hard, powerful kiss that almost made me jump on him but he pulled away all too quickly.

I sighed as he picked me up and helped me off the chair. Then he ran downstairs to where the rest of his family was sitting watching TV. Emmett and Alice smiled at me happily, as did Esme, Carlisle and japer, but Rosalie continued to stare at the TV. I could feel Edward growl deep in his chest as he helped me off his back. In one swift motion Rosalie got up and walked out of the room towards the garage.

"Edward," I said looking up at him, "maybe we should go look at the nursery. I don't want to disrupt anything."

Edward sighed and nodded, not wanting me to feel uncomfortable. He took my hand and walked me up to his room instead of the nursery. Not that I was complaining or anything.

He left me at the doorway and walked over to his stereo and started shuffling threw some CDs. I, on the other hand, walked over to his new bed and sat down on it.

"Why did you get a bed? It's completely unnecessary," I said.

He seemed to find the CD he wanted because he was on the bed with me within seconds. "I don't think it's unnecessary. It is meant for you for whenever you decided to move in," he said smiling.

"I don't need a bed! I thought the couch was perfectly comfortable," I said as Her Eyes by Pat Monahan played in the background.

He rolled his eyes. "you won't think it's very comfortable whenever you are eight months pregnant. Besides you don't use a bed just to sleep on," he said softly with a playful smile.

Before I even had time to catch my breath, his lips crashed to mine. He then started pulling me on top of him as he laid down on the bed. Then he stopping kissing my lips, but instead, started kissing my neck, my collarbone and behind my ear. I grew impatient and pulled his head up to have his lips meet mine.

'See this would be difficult on the couch," he whispered against my lips.

I giggled as I kissed him again. When he kissed me this time it was more passionate and heated than any other kiss I could remember. It was like he never really kissed me before this one. Like he was holding back that much.

But after that he pulled away and wrapped his arms around my waist. I looked at him to kiss him again, but he held me in my spot.

"Bella, it's was hard enough to concentrate on not killing you when you were just one person, but not that you are pregnant you scent is even more potent. Could you help me out and not make this more difficult than it already is?"

"I'm not promising anything," I said smiling.

"I'm sorry to give you the wrong impression then; I was just demonstrating what the bed could be used for. Besides the last time we did this," he said waving between us, "that happened," he said waving top my belly.

I giggled. "Well that can't happen again. But I do like the bed."

He sighed and rolled his eyes at me. He then started to stroke my hair and hum my lullaby, which my me realize how tired I was. I smiled as I drifted off into sleep.

_I was walking through the forest somewhere close to Forks because of all the green that was around me. I just kept on walking until I saw that my bath in the woods was coming to an end. I walked through the trees into a familiar place. The clearing. I looked at my feet to make sure I would slip to protect my seven month belly. Suddenly something sped in front of me and then around me. Before I even had time to look behind me, flaming red hair engulfed my vision. I backed up to see the thirsty red eyes of a female. I turned to run and when I did I saw Edward coming this way. Before I could even take a step towards him, the teeth of the female sunk into my neck._

I shot up out of Edwards arms. Edward sat up quickly and wrapped a blanket around me. I didn't even realize I was shaking. "What's wrong love?" Did you have a nightmare?" I nodded slowly. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

"Victoria."

Edward's expression went cold and his arms wrapped around me tightly. "it was just a bad dream love. I promise nothing will come near you. I won't be gone long enough for anything to touch you," he said softly.

I let out a deep breath, not even realizing I was hold it, and closed my eyes. Then I buried my face in his cold chest. "I believe you," I murmured.

He chuckled. "Come on, love, I'll take you home."

"What what time is it?"

"It's close to five and since your father doesn't know you skipped school then we should get back."

I yawned and nodded as Edward picked me up and raced downstairs and out the door into the cold December air. Then he swiftly placed me into his car and sped out of his driveway.

"So are you coming back to school?" I asked.

He didn't say anything for a minute. He seemed to be debating that himself. "I'm not sure," he said slowly. "Alice and I have been wondering if we should. I mean I would be a lot easier to look after you if I went back, but we've been too… preoccupied lately."

"With what?"

"Nothing too important," he said kissing my hand.

I didn't believe him. Alice saw something that worried Edward enough to make him fully aware 24/7. I just had no idea of what I could possibly be.

I let my mind wonder all the way back to the Charlie's house and even as he led me into the house and I started cooking dinner. I briefly looked over to him and saw his worried look as he watched me. What happened to me that made him look like that?

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"What's wrong with me? Love, you haven't said anything since the beginning of the car ride! Did you forget I cannot read you mind and it's the only mind I want to know all about? It's extremely frustrating not knowing what you are thinking. What's on your mind? Please don't torture me much longer."

I looked down sheepishly. "I was just wondering what could not be that important, but still keep you preoccupied enough to not come to school with me."

He put his finger under my chin and lifted my head up so he could look at my eyes. He sighed. "I've missed those eyes, please stop hiding them like that," he said teasingly.

"Then don't distract me," I said playfully.

He smiled. "it's nothing that you need to worry about right now. We have it under control. Can we leave it at that?" I shook my head. "I figured you wouldn't be satisfied with that."

"If you don't tell me, you know I'll just ask Alice to tell me what's really going on."

"I know." Edward took a deep breath to tell me, but suddenly a sharp pain came to my left side. I closed my eyes and stammered backwards before falling to the floor.

"Bella!" Edward yelled as he quickly picked me up and ran to his house.

All I could think was my babies, one's noting making it.

* * *

A/N: Sorry about the cliff hanger, but the updates won't be this bad again! I mean it! Hope you enjoyed. I was orginally going to make this into two seprate chapters, but then I was like screw it and just made it into one long-ish chapter:) hope you like it. Well, that and I'm on a major sugar high:) I just saw Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and I just got hyper. Great movie by the way, so funny! Oh and I need boy name ideas… just in case... I know I'm mean.


	9. Gaining Dreams

A/N: Sorry guys!! I've been so busy with basketball and school it's been hard for me to update anything. Plus I was sort of having writer's block for this chapter. I couldn't decide how I want to start the chapter. Well I hate to keep you waiting much longer! Enjoy.

January 11, 2009

I don't own anything; if I did I wouldn't be writing this would I?

* * *

I started hearing voices quickly talking to one another. Most of the times I couldn't even understand what they were saying. They all talked too fast for my ears. The parts of the conversation I caught didn't sound very good for the person they were talking about.

"Listen to me, she's going to be okay, we just don't know what's wrong yet," a musical voice said urgently.

"Carlisle this shouldn't be happening! You said everything was going to be okay and that the babies weren't going to be a parasite! Right now they seem to just want to suck her dry," a velvet voice said. He sounded like an angel.

"They aren't parasites, this happens with miscarriages. Now from what I can tell there isn't one, but I can't be too sure about that unless we run the tests. You have to make a decision," Carlisle said.

"I still can't see anything, you're going to have to wing it," a pixie type voice said.

I wanted to yell to them to ask what was wrong with this woman, but I couldn't find my voice, let alone open my mouth.

"Alice, could you please try and concentrate harder. I don't think Bella has much time left unless we make this decision now," Carlisle said.

What was wrong with Bella, why didn't she have enough time yet? What's going on?

"Bella, love," the angel's voice said now very close to me, "please wake up. The babies need you to be awake; I need you to be awake."

Suddenly in the background a beeping voice came slower. I hadn't even noticed that before. I sounded like it was slowing to a complete stop, and I seemed to be slipping away from the angel's voice who was screaming something.

Carlisle voice suddenly came louder than any other voice, "CLEAR!"

A sort of electric shock came through me making me feel more alive than I had before just listening to the angel, the pixie and Carlisle.

The beeping in the background started to speed up and the voices became clearer. "Bella, stay with us," the pixie said.

"Love, hold on! You're strong, I know you can do this!" the angel said.

"Son, she's steady for now. I need to start the test to see if we need to take her into surgery.

The angel sighed. "Just keep her alive."

"WAIT!" the pixie said extremely loudly. I wanted to cover my ears, but my arms were too heavy to move.

There was a long pause. It seemed to go on for hours. I just sat there trying to hear what the pixie was telling everyone, but there didn't seem to be any voices.

The angel's voice came close to me once more and whispered, "You're going to be okay love, just hang in there a few more minutes. Are you sure about the babies Alice?"

"Unfortunately yes. There doesn't seem to be anything that you can do that will fix it yet. The boy is going to be healthy and strong, but the girl…"

"Is going to be alive, that's all I care about," the angel said cutting off the angel.

Wait, I wanted to know what was wrong with the baby girl. Was she going to be normal? Was she going to be able to walk? What happened to her?

"Do you have any idea how this happened Carlisle?" the pixie asked.

"Well for teen mother's this sometimes happen, I'm just happy they will be both be healthy and alive."

"What caused all the pain than?" the angel asked.

"Her heart isn't strong enough at the moment. The pain happens with every pregnant woman, most of the time they don't even feel it."

"Is she going to be okay?" the angel asked urgently.

"She'll make it," said the pixie all-knowingly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yep, I can see her giving birth right now. She'll be okay."

I felt a sort of strength I didn't have before whenever the pixie said this, I opened my eyes and looked about the bright room. I seemed to be in a hospital room surrounded by three extremely beautiful people. I was hooked up to three machines, two heart machines and an IV.

"Bella, are you alright?" the angel asked me urgently.

_I must be Bella, _I thought. "Um, yes."

I knew him from somewhere I remembered him, but I couldn't remember how. Then he put his hands on my face, and I suddenly became aware of how hot I was. His icy cold hands felt amazing on my skin.

Then everything came back.

_I fell to the floor clutching my side. Edward came rushing over to me saying, "Love what's wrong? What hurts?"_

"_My… my…" I couldn't say much more because of the pain._

_Edward didn't think twice as he picked me up and rushed me out of the house. Thankfully no one was home, or it would have taken awhile for me to leave. Then again Edward might have just jumped out the window without talking to anyone._

_We arrived at his house later, my side still throbbing with pain. What was happening? Where the babies okay?_

"_Edward, what's wrong?" Esme asked coming out of the living room. When she saw me laying limp in Edward's arms, she rushed upstairs and two seconds later Carlisle was there taking me out of Edward's arms._

_At first Edward refused to let me go, but with a warning look from Carlisle he let go. "What's wrong with her?" Edward asked rushing after us as Carlisle carried me upstairs._

"_I'm not entirely sure yet. Let me just check her out and I'll find out."_

_They brought me up into a room where I've never been before and laid me down on a bed. It was quiet comfortable. Carlisle started to lightly press my belly making me wince a few times._

The suddenly, at one minute I was looking up at Edward, holding his hand tightly and the next everything went black. I still don't understand what happened to me.

"Edward, what happened?" I asked him quietly.

"You're heart failed, love," he said so soft that I could barely hear him. "You're heart is not as strong as we all thought and caring the twins is putting a lot of strain on it trying to keep three people alive." He paused for a second looking at Alice and Carlisle then back at me. "I wish I could have seen this coming. I wouldn't have let this happen."

I took a deep breath. He was right after all. If he knew that I was going to be in danger like this he would have never let any of this happen to me with him. "Edward it's not your fault."

"Bella's right. None of us could have known how weak her heart was going to be," Alice said coming up to the other side of my bed rubbing my arm.

Carlisle then came forward. He must have thought something because Edward looked at him a long second and said, "That seems to be the only thing we can do, doesn't it?"

He nodded and left the room followed by Alice, who probably saw what they were talking about. Then Edward turned back to me, his eyes full of worry and carefulness.

"What is the only thing you can do?" I asked him.

"Well we are thinking that we must put you on bed rest right away. That way you're heart doesn't need to be-_killing_- itself fast," he said throw his teeth.

"What about school?" I asked.

"I'll have someone bring home your homework everyday and we will make up some disease so that you won't have visitors and is good enough for you to be out of school for the rest of the year."

"What are you going to do?"

"Well, I'll be at your house, of course, looking after you."

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "You should go to school too. What's going to be your excuse?"

"That I ran away from home to join the circus, since I'm already a freak I'll fit right in," he said matter-of-factly.

"Very funny, but seriously, you should continue going to school."

"Bella, I'm not going to leave you alone. Look I'll have it all figure out. You can just relax and stop worry."

I nodded knowing I would never win this argument. It seemed to be a lost cause. I looked over to him once more. He was watching my belly rise up and down with my breaths. I smiled weakly. "Edward."

"Hmm?"

"Can I move into your house with you?" I asked timidly.

He looked over at me, beaming, and kissed me on the mouth for the first time since I woke up. "Love, nothing would make me happier."

I smiled back at him and scooted over to make room for him in my hospital bed. As I nuzzled back into his arms and he kissed the top of my head an idea popped into my head. "Can we leave the hospital yet?"

"Soon love, why?"

"I'm not very fond of them," I admitted.

He laughed and kissed me once more.

_A week later…_

Emmett brought in my last box as Jasper, helped by Edward, started unpacking most of my things. Alice was with me on the couch downstairs, flipping through the channels while I rubbed my belly. Five more months to go…

Rosalie sort of stayed clear of me, but wasn't being as rude as she normally was. She often just kept to her and Emmett's room.

Esme was always making food for me, which was sort of nice because I was always hungry.

Carlisle made sure that I kept to the couch or the bed at all times. He was probably the most worried about me next to Edward.

Charlie, on the other hand, wasn't thrilled about me moving into the Cullen's house. Renee talked him in to letting me once I told her my decision to move in with them. Also she said it would be a lot easier having a doctor in the house with me since I'm pretty much on bed rest for five months.

Edward quickly came downstairs and kissed me on the forehead. "We are almost done with our room, so Alice you can go shopping soon for things for Bella."

Alice smiled excitedly. "Good, you'll have to come, or course, Edward. I'm going to need to know what she likes and you can tell me that."

"Alice you know what I like," I told her trying to save Edward. "Besides you don't listen to me anyways whenever I tell you not to buy me that."

Alice rolled her eyes. "Bella, you know I only buy the things that will look good on you."

"Translating to anything I can get my hands onto," Emmett said coming into the room and sitting on the opposite couch.

Alice stuck her tongue out at him and got up of the couch. "Edward, we will go shopping later. Emmett, you're going to come too."

"Someone needs to stay with Bella, so I'll do that," Emmett said quickly.

"Nope, Jasper can do that." Alice said turning to look at him.

"Alice, I'm not leaving Bella," Edward said in a stern voice. "I'm not going."

Alice rolled her eyes and huffed out of the room.

"Great that means I'll be there three hours longer than normal because I said that about her," Emmett said putting his feet up on the coffee table.

"Well, you shouldn't have said that about her, now should you of?" I said teasingly.

"Feet off the table Emmett!" Esme said carrying in a bowl of soup for me. "Hear you go Bella."

"Thanks," I said taking it.

After everything was settled and Alice dragged Emmett and Rosalie out of the house (which was weird considering Rosalie didn't want anything to do with me, let alone shop for me) Edward carried me upstairs to our new room, which didn't look much differ than it did before, besides some of my things here and there in the room.

He rested me down softly on his bed and laid next to me putting his hand on my stomach which was growing bigger and bigger, but with a nice and big sweatshirt you could barely tell.

"Are you feeling okay?" he asked me.

I closed my eyes and nodded, now fully aware of how tired I was.

"Good," I heard him whisper.

Then I no longer felt his hand on my stomach or a place next to me. I quickly opened my eyes and looked up to his closet, which I now saw him looking for something in the bottom of it.

Before I had time to ask him what he was doing, he was back again with something in his left hand.

He eased himself back down next to me and placed a small velvet box on my belly.

I looked over at him curiously, not knowing whether I should just leave it there or open it. He nodded telling me to open it, and when I did I saw a beautiful diamond ring. It must have cost a fortune.

"Edward-"

"Bella, this was my mother's engagement ring that my father bought for her back in the late 1800s. She told me to give it to the person who I love more than anything else in the world right before she died. I've held onto it trying to find someone who I couldn't live without, and I found that person.

"I never want to live another day without you in my life, Bella. I wish I could grow old with you, but I can't. But I will promise you to love you for all eternity. I want to marry you, Isabella Marie Swan."

He quickly sat up and took the tiny box out of my hand and held it up to me. "Will you marry me?"

I stared at him completely awed and bewildered. It happened so fast. One moment I was about to fall asleep and the next I was being proposed to. _But I'm only eighteen!_ A tiny voice yelled in my head. But the rest of me seemed to not care.

"Yes," I whispered.

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A/N: I hoped you like it. It seemed to have a lot in it, but I don't know made it interesting. Sorry for the long wait, but I'll try to update faster. I'll try to update next weekend sometime along with my other stories. Review please!


	10. Author's Note

Author's Note:

Hey guys! I'm so sorry it's taking me forever to write the next chapter. I swear I've actually been sitting down a lot in front of my computer with a blank document up hoping that it will just come to me, but it hasn't. So to tell you the truth I am having a _major_ writer's block. I started to get things flowing and then I deleted it all because none of it made sense to me with the story. I don't want to skip to far ahead, but I don't really understand where the story is going to go.

I am on Spring Break right now! Yay! So I'm going to be thinking of ways I can go with this story. Sorry if you were expecting this to be a chapter and your disappointed it's not. I normally hate doing Author's Notes, but I felt bad and thought I should explain that I didn't forget, I just don't know what to write.

Any suggestions will be appreciated. Also I need some boys names still. Hopefully it will just come to me before I have to go back to school. Thanks for sticking with me!

~AlwaysAndForever13


	11. This Is For Keeps

A/N: I know it took forever! Sorry!!! But I think I figured out all out:) Thanks for staying with me through this major writer's block!!!

I do not own anything not even the title This Is For Keeps by The Spill Canvas

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I sighed, watching my belly rise up and fall back down. One of the babies kicked me a little harshly. I winced.

Edward raised his body up to look at me before I could even blink. "Are you okay love?" His eyes were full of concern.

I nodded, placing my hand over my stomach protectively. I knew Edward didn't like this, but I knew he loves them as much as I do. It's just hard, knowing what we know.

Going into labor with the twins could possible kill me, well more then possibly. Edward has been going back in forth with complete joy that he is going to become a father, which he never thought would happen, and complete shame and frustration and sadness that this could kill me.

I, however, was completely okay with the whole thing. If I died and the twins lived, then at least I gave two people life though I'm taking away mine. I just don't want to leave Edward.

I looked up into Edward's eyes and back down to my hands, left over right with a ring on my third finger. Then I looked back into the eyes of my fiancé.

"You know what I was thinking," I said easing back into the bed we were laying in.

Edward smiled, happy for a reason not to think about my death, and place this cold hand over mine. "What," he whispered.

"I was thinking about names for our baby boy."

"Really? What did you have in mind?"

"What do you think about naming him Mason Anthony?"

He looked surprised. "You want to name him after me?"

"And your family," I pointed out thinking of the first name.

"Why?"

I rolled onto my side so I could look at Edward closely. He put his hand on my cheek and brushed away of hair. "I love you so much Edward. I wanted both of our children's names to have some meaning to me. I want to name our daughter after your mother and Alice, because your mother saved you life and, in a way, brought me to you. Alice because she is my very best friend."

I looked down at started to pinch Edward's shirt. "I want to name our son after you because of how much you mean to me. You gave my life a whole different meaning than I ever thought I would have."

Edward put his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. "Bella, you have no idea how much this means to me. Whatever you would like to name our children is perfect with me because you are gave me the only thing I never thought I would have. Love. You loved me more than I deserve. Thank you," he whispered pressing his lips to my forehead and pulling me into his chest again. Just holding me close.

I felt his shoulders shake with laughter minutes later. I looked up at him, confused. He shook his head. "The twins seem to calm down when you are so close to me, don't they?"

I smiled. "I think it's because I feel safe with your arms around me, so they do too."

He shrugged, still smiling playfully. "That may be."

I looked straight into his eyes, trying to freeze this moment. I couldn't let him know how afraid I was of giving birth to half-vampire, half-human twins. Seriously, it's not like they have What To Expect When You're Expecting The Living Dead. That would be a great help to me if they did.

"What's wrong, love?" Edward asked.

"I just wish they had some kind of knowledge of _this_," I said waving my hand down my body, "then maybe I wouldn't be so afraid of what might happen to the twins, to me."

His arms tightened around me. "Nothing is going to happen Bella." I shrugged. "No," he put his fingertip under my chin forcing me to look into his eyes, "I'm not losing you. Nothing is going to happen to you, and the twins are going to be just fine."

"How can you be sure that nothing is going to happen to us, though? I thought Alice couldn't see anything yet."

"She may not, but I know that_ I'm not going to lose you_."

I nodded, looking down at the ring on my finger. I twisted it around. I needed to change this subject; it stressed me out too much.

Edward sensed this too. "When should we have the wedding, love?" he asked, his voice softening up as he kissed my forehead again.

With the condition I'm in, I was put on bed rest, full-time. Charlie didn't like the fact that I wasn't at home anymore, but he understood that I would need the attention of a doctor 24/7, which is why Edward's house was perfect for me.

Lately, I've been getting stressed out easier and easier. Not only am I freaking out about giving birth to the twins, but I'm not freaked out about getting married, what I'm going to do once the twins are out, what is going to happen to the twins since we don't know which trait (vampire or human) will be the dominant one, and if the vampire gene is then what am I going to do being the only human in the family, not to mention how will I be able to take care of two vampire children. That is, if I even get through the labor.

Carlisle has made it perfectly clear that I cannot get stressed out since it's not good for babies anyways, but with my condition, it's even worse.

Edward knew all of this, of course; he just didn't understand that the wedding was not a good topic for me either.

I still haven't told my parents about our engagement. It's been a few weeks since he has proposed and in that time Charlie as visited every day, Renee as called twice every day-sometimes three times. I just haven't found the courage to tell them that on top of being pregnant, their only daughter, who is still a teenager in college, is getting married to a vampire, also the father of said daughter's unborn babies. Talk about complicated.

So I haven't told them yet.

Edward never approved of this, but he didn't want to upset me and force me to tell them, so he has let it go on the condition that I tell them before I walk down the aisle to say I Do.

Ugh men.

"I don't want to be pregnant when we get married," I told him as I buried my head further in his chest. I really didn't want to have this conversation, which would, no doubt, led to me telling my parents.

"You know you are still the most beautiful thing," Edward whispered in my ear.

I just shook my head. There was no arguing with him. "Still, I would like to be able to walk down the aisle, not be pushed down in a wheelchair."

I felt him nod. "I understand. Well since the twins are due in June, I was thinking a late August wedding."

"Or mid July."

He smirked. "At sunset."

"Maybe Rosalie or Esme could push the twins down the aisle," I said looking up at him with a smile on my face.

He smiled back at me and smoothed back my hair. "I think that would be great. Maybe Esme and Renee could walk them down."

I groaned.

"Bella, we _must_ tell them! They are your parents."

"I know, I just… I just don't need to get into a argument right now."

"Why would they want to argue wish to marry me?"

Edward loosened his arms around my waist as I rolled onto my back once more. Edward propped himself on his elbow and rubbed my belly.

"You know my parents got married young, and you know it didn't turn out well at all. My mother has ingrained in my head that it's terrible to get married young, with no real experiences in life."

"Is that why you hesitated when I proposed?" he asked with a teasing smile.

I looked at him seriously and nodded. All joking vanished. "Edward, you know I love you, but I just didn't want to disappoint my mother. She always told me smart women wait to get married and I always agreed with her, until I met you."

He flashed me a smile and cupped my face in his hands. He kissed my gently on the lips and pulled back still holding my face. "I thought I was damned to a life of solitary. I didn't think anyone would want someone like me. I didn't think I would lucky enough to feel love. Then I met you, and all the darkness surrounding my life vanished."

I smiled up at him. I did need to tell my parents. No matter how much I don't want to and no matter how much they are going to upset with me, I have to face them.

"Edward, could you call Renee and ask her to fly up this week."

He nodded. "Anything love."

I smiled at him as he released my face and laid back on his side. I found his hand and held it close to me as I drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

The rest of the week seemed to go by in a blur. Renee agreed to fly up on Thursday and she would stay with us for a few days as Phil did his winter conditioning. I talked my parents to have a family meal, including Edward, on Friday. I was going to tell them then.

In the mean time, I was kept busy with Alice planning a mid-July wedding. She had the date set for July 23. She was trying to get the right time so that the sun would not be high enough to cast it's rays over the trees that surrounded the creek behind the Cullen's house.

Alice was doing everything it seemed like. At some points it seemed like it was her wedding and not my own.

She was adding people to the guest list left and right. She made sure that the humans attending got a meal and a chose between chicken and steak. Then she was picking color scheme, midnight blue and silver. She started to make a playlist for the DJ, even contacting bands to play as I walked down the aisle. Then she called in for the boy's tuxes, and the girl's bridesmaid's dresses. The only thing she really needed me for was the wedding dress.

Every time she came to me with a wedding magazine, I would try my best to get anyone's attention to get me out of the room. Most of the time it was either Edward or Emmett. Edward would leave the room since he wasn't allowed to see anyways, and Emmett would laugh and try to help Alice!

"Look, Alice, I appreciate you doing all of this for Edward and I, since I wouldn't know the first thing to do, but I can't really pick out a wedding dress when I'm not going to be able to fit into it!" I said Friday afternoon, an hour before my mother was due to arrive.

Alice groaned. "Bella, how many times do I have to tell you? I know your size and I can hem it without you even needing to step into the dress. All you have to do is pick a dress that you like so that you actually have something to wear on July 23!"

I rolled my eyes and motioned to her to hand me the magazine. She smiled and jumped closer to me. "Now, what exactly are you looking for?" she asked.

I shrugged. "I'm not actually sure," I said taking the magazine from her. "Let me just look and I'll tag anything that I like."

She nodded and jumped off the couch and out of the living room.

I sighed as I opened the first page of the magazine. I grimaced at the dress. Yes the top was a pretty halter top, as white as snow, but then it flowed out, and the skirt of it was made of feathers.

I shook my head and went onto the next page. It was just plain and simple, the way I like it. It was haltered as well, but the bottom of the dress just went straight down. I cocked my head to the side to see if I really liked it, and tagged the page.

I flipped the page once more, and caught my breath. It was a strapless dress with a dark blue band going across the top of the dress. It had a tight corset fit till the top of the hips and then it flowed out into a Cinderella-type of dress, but instead of just flowing straight, the skirt was bunched and twisted in ways that made it beautiful. It was floor length with no train. It was perfect.

Just then the doorbell rang. Suddenly, Edward was sitting on the floor right next to me on the couch. He cocked his head to the side and smiled at me. "Ready?"

I tried to smile at him, but it felt too unnatural for me to hold.

Alice came skipping to the door and opened it up to where my mother and father were standing with smiles on their faces.

"Bella!" Renee exclaimed running to the couch to give me a hug. "Oh you look radiant! The twins are really growing, aren't they?"

I laughed and nodded, putting my hand to my stomach reflexively.

"Bells," Charlie said coming up behind my mother.

"Hey dad."

I didn't even realize Edward was standing behind me until he put his hand on my shoulder. "Do you want to go to the dining table?"

I nodded and Edward quickly helped me to my feet after realizing he couldn't just carry me without some serious questions coming his way.

I walked gingerly next to Edward even though he still held most of my weight. "Slowly, love," he whispered in my ear. When we finally got myself in a chair, Edward went to the kitchen to bring everything out.

We had a nice family meal. At first there was tension in the air, which I assume was because of Edward. My parents still didn't know what to think of Edward sudden return into my life. But the air cleared and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. Too bad I had to stop the party.

I looked at Edward and gave him a small nod. I cleared my throat. "Mom, Dad, Edward and I need to tell you something."

"You're engaged," Renee stated casually.

I gapped at her. "How did you…?"

She smiled at me. "Well I am your mother, aren't I? When you called me the other day and asked me to fly up here, I figured it out. I knew this was going to happen soon, whether you were pregnant or not, Bella. I see the way you look at him, the way he looks at you. I can tell how much you mean to him, and how much you love him."

I stared at her not able to comprehend what she was saying. Basically she knew all along, and I was worried for nothing?

"Bella, honey, it's okay. When I first say you together at the hospital after you fell down those stairs all those months ago, I knew you two had a special bond," she continued looking from Edward to myself. "I knew that you had found your soul mate."

I wanted to run over and hug her, but my body wouldn't allow me to move a muscle. She understood, though, and walked up and hugged me with tears streaming down her face, matching my own.

Without saying anything Charlie got up and joined us as well. "As long as you are happy Bella," he said softly.

We all broke apart as I sniffed and stared at Edward, who was smiling at me with an I-told-you-so look in his eyes.

I smiled back at him and rolled my eyes.

He smirked and walked up to me, putting his arm around my shoulders as he talked to my parents about everything we were already planning for the wedding.

I sat there and listened to them laugh and talked joyfully about everything happening. I smiled to myself and couldn't help but think that maybe this was a good sign.

* * *

A/N: Sorry if this is a little slow, but I needed a filler so I can get everything into full sing in the next chapter. Once again, thanks so much for sticking with me! I know it's been long, but I haven't given up on this story!


	12. Forever's Not Long Enough

A/N: Hey guys. Sorry it's taking me forever again, but I finally figured out the rest of the story, like to the end! So things should be flowing much easier and faster. But I don't know how many more chapters there will be.

April 3, 2010

I don't own anything, like always.

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_Crash!_

1…2…3…4-

_Crash!_

Another flash of lightning and crash of thunder appeared outside Edward's window. Rain splattered against the glass harshly and the wind blew fiercely through the trees.

The power has been out for about an hour now, and Edward still wasn't back from his hunting trip with Emmett and Jasper. I was starting to get worried that they were stuck in the middle of the storm. I mean what if they got struck by lightning close to a tree and they both just go up in flames?

Alice laughed at me when I voice that theory then she went back to picking out the menu for the wedding. I still don't know how she is doing that since she doesn't eat.

The babies, however, seemed strangely calm during the storm. Unlike their mother who still has trouble sleeping when it's raining outside.

According to Carlisle, everything is going well. I'm eight months pregnant now and the due date just seems to being approaching so much faster than I wanted. Edward has been getting tenser everyday as well. And Alice still can't see me going into labor and coming out of it alive, so no pressure or anything.

No matter what happens, though, Edward has already promised me that I will be there to see our baby girl and boy grow up to be half human, half vampire adults. Then we will get married the first chance we can after the twins come. So Alice is planning on a mid July wedding.

Since it's already June, the summer heat has been a little irritating, but when Edward's home, his body heat keeps me at the perfect temperature. If he's gone hunting, like today, the Cullen's normally have the house very cold. But since the power is out, the air conditioner isn't working, Edward's hunting, and I'm not very comfortable.

I can't deny that I'm still a little freaked out about the outcome of my babies. This has never happened before, as far as the Cullen's know. I mean in Carlisle's 300-odd years, he's never seen a human get impregnated by a vampire.

I continued to sit on the window seal and star into the storm, counting the seconds until another flash of lightning lights up the room. Then, suddenly, the trees rustled and out came Emmett, Jasper, and Edward all laughing, walking casually to the house like there was no lightning behind them.

I rolled my eyes and place my hands over my stomach. "Here comes daddy guys," I whispered as my gaze turn to the door, which Edward came through seconds later in fresh, clean, dry clothing.

I raised my eyebrow in wonder. "Alice saw us," he said casually coming over and kissing me on the forehead and then my stomach. "She had clean clothes waiting for us so we wouldn't get the house wet."

I nodded and smiled. "Well did you catch anything good?"

He rolled his eyes at my normal tone. He still doesn't understand how I can be so casual. "A few deer, Emmett was happy to find some bear, and I found a fox right before we came back."

"So it was good?"

He shrugged. "So what have you been doing?"

"Sitting here; waiting for you to come home."

"How are the twins?"

"Surprisingly calm," I said looking back down at my huge stomach.

He smiled and placed his cool hand on top of mine. "Pretty soon they will be out of there."

I nodded. "Can you hear their thoughts? Are they developed enough?"

"A little, their voices are relatively soft. I don't know if that's because they brains aren't fully developed, or because they have you for a mother."

"What do you mean?"

"When I first found out you were pregnant I didn't think I would be able to hear our child at all since I cannot hear you. It was a pleasant surprised when I heard our daughter and soon after I heard our son. Their 'voices' are very soft, like Charlie's, but they are there."

I smiled. "What are they thinking?"

He shrugged. "I was able to make out both of them saying they love you and me when you were sleeping the other night, but I had to concentrate very hard just to hear them."

"But you can hear them?"

"Yes."

"I wonder why you can hear them, but not me."

"I still don't understand why I cannot hear you, and I'm amazed that I can hear our children. I thought that they would get that gene from you. I don't know what I would have done."

"But maybe it would have been better if you didn't know what your daughter was thinking. Her teen years could be very difficult for you," I teased.

He smiled and rolled his eyes. "At least now she will never be able to hid anything. Which may come in handy if she is anything like you and has a knack for coming into contact with supernatural beings."

I grimaced. "I hope our daughter doesn't have my luck."

Edward shook his head as he laughed. "I don't think I would be able to handle two of you."

I nudged him playfully, and one of the babies kicked me.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked on his feet leaning over me when he noticed me wince.

"They didn't like how I moved. I'm fine; really, " I said putting my hand on his cold cheek. His face relaxed at my touch.

"Are you cold enough?"

I nodded. "I'm fine."

He nodded, and then after a short silence he added, "Alice ordered the dress."

"What dress?" I asked.

"The dress you tagged for her in the wedding magazine she gave you right before your mother came."

"Oh."

"She also figured out just about everything else, but we have to decide our song," he said softly as he pulled me off the window seal and carried me to bed.

"I can't think of a song that would describe what we have," I whispered back.

He kissed my forehead and placed his hand on my stomach. "We still have time."

"Not enough," I said softly.

In the next week I had yet another doctors appointment with Carlisle. He's worried that the babies are, in simple terms, sucking the life out of me. Not terribly that they will kill me before I give birth, but enough that it will make me too weak to survive the birth.

Carlisle is also worried about the rib they broke. However, he told me that he had a theory that would help make me stronger. Whatever it was Edward didn't like it one bit. He grimaced when Carlisle just mentioned he might know something that would help me.

As I laid on the bed Carlisle made up in his office, with Edward beside me holding my hand, Carlisle took the babies last ultrasound picture and made sure I was fine. Then he brought his chair around and sat down at my head. Edward tensed up beside me.

"Now I have a theory on how you may be able to get your strength back. I'm not sure if this will do anything for the babies, or may just make you a little sick. It's worth a shot though," Carlisle said with a shrug.

Edward turned around and started at one of the many paintings in his office. His face was grave and distant. His hand was clutched into a fist by my head, but his other hand was rubbing my hand softly with his thumb.

Carlisle spun around to get something that was on the desk behind him, and then turned back to face me with a little cup in his hand. I saw Edward's eyes darken out of the corner of my eye.

"What is it?" I asked mildly interested. I was still concentrating on Edward.

"Blood," he said matter-of-factly. "O positive to be exact."

And just like that my attention was on the cup and only the cup. "Blood?" I repeated hoping that I heard him wrong.

He nodded. "I have a theory that because you are giving birth to half human half vampire babies, that maybe the reason that you are getting weaker and weaker each month is due to the fact that the twins are half vampire. They are draining the life out of you to give them life, like we do with our prey."

"In other words, they are becoming parasites," Edward hissed.

Carlisle shot him a warning look and must have told him something in his thoughts because Edward just turned away without another word. I, on the other hand, tried not to be hurt by his words. I only squeezed his hand a little harder hoping he got the idea.

Carlisle handed me the cup and in a flash put a straw in it for me. I grimaced at the idea of drinking blood as a human, especially human blood, but I brought the cup to my nose to smell it and was sickened by the fact that it smelled appetizing. I slowly took the straw to my lips and took a quick sip. The babies both stirred quiet calmly, for a change, and I felt a little better as well.

"Now," Carlisle said looking down at a chart, while I took another sip out of the cup, "if this works, than hopefully the boy-"

"Mason," I corrected.

He smiled, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Edward relax and a smile dance across his face. "Than hopefully Mason will grow much stronger and become much better off for the birth. The girl-"

"Elizabeth," Edward said softly.

Carlisle looked up at Edward and flashed another smile at him. "Elizabeth seems strong enough, but that's because she is taking more of the nutrients from her brother and a little too much from you. So I hope that blood is the solution to this problem.

"However," he said after a short pause, "I'm still not positive if this will help you. Bella, this birth is still very risky. Giving birth to just one of these babies would be bad enough, but two is very life-threatening."

He stood up and walked over to Edward and me. He put one hand on my stomach, and one on Edward hand. "I'm so very sorry."

With that he left the room to leave Edward and I alone. I looked up into Edward's face worried with what I would see. He looked so very far away, his eyes grace, his body tense. His hand was still holding mine though; slowly making circles with his thumb on the back of my hand. I couldn't figure out if it was to keep me calm, or to keep him calm.

"Edward," I said after many minutes of silence, "please say something."

I watched as his whole body transformed. His face relaxed slightly, his eyes warmed up as he turned to face me. He kneeled on the ground so that he was looking at me face to face. Then he dropped his head, in a defeated manner, so that it was resting on our intertwined hands.

"Bella, they are killing you. They are forcing you to drink blood, human blood. And there is no one to blame but myself," he said softly. "I should have never let this happen, I should have been more careful."

"Edward-"

"If I never left you than I could have stopped this from going too far!"

"Edward-"

"I could have prevented this. You would be healthy, going to school, finishing your senior year. We could have been getting ready for you to go to college as well. Instead you are forced to stay in bed and worry about the outcome of this."

"Ed-"

Suddenly he looked up before I could finish saying his name. He stared at me intently, grasping my hand with both of his. "Bella, I cannot and I will not lose you. I love you."

A tear escaped from my eye as I leaned in to kiss his softly on the lips. He kissed me back and then cradled me to his chest, humming my lullaby softly.

Later that day I decided there was something I had to do. Something that would help Edward understand that I do not blame him if things do not turn out as planned. But I wasn't sure how to explain it to him.

So I wrote a letter.

_Dear Edward,_

_I don't know what to say. If you are reading this, it's probably because I have passed away giving birth to Elizabeth Alice Cullen and Mason Anthony Cullen. But I want you to know something; I __do not__ blame you at all for what happened to me in the end. You gave me the greatest joy of not only motherhood, even if it was sort lived, but also of love._

_Edward you showed me a love that I never thought possible. You are my soul mate, my other half, the only person in the world who knows me best. And even though you cannot read my mind, it always seemed like you could._

_Edward I love you so much and I know that you will be an amazing father to our babies. You will love them unconditionally and you will be gentle and kind to them._

_But please, promise me one thing. Do not go on for the rest of eternity depressed and full of regret. Please move on; please be happy; and please, don't be afraid of falling in love again._

_I will love you always and forever,_

_Bella_

And as I tucked it away under his mattress so that I know he would be able to find it, my water broke.

* * *

A/N: Sorry it seemed a little choppy in the middle, but I just had the idea of how to finish the chapter out of no where and I kind of rushed to get it all out. I hope you enjoyed it! The next chapter should be much faster considering I know exactly where to go with it… finally.


	13. This Cliche Tragedy

A/N: Look guys, I'm actually updating fast! Ha-ha. See I told you I know where I'm going now:) Plus I'm on Spring Break. Well I hope you enjoy it!

April 4, 2010

I don't own anything trust me.

* * *

_You are the strength that keeps me walking_

_You are the hope that keeps me trusting_

_You are the light to my soul_

_You are my purpose, You're everything_

**Edward's POV**

Silence. It's a dreadful sound. You never know what's going to come of the silence. If it shall be a good silence, or a terrible silence. In many ways, silence can kill you; it can torture you to a point where you go mad. Waiting and waiting for something to wake you up from this horrible nightmare where there is not sound is like waiting for death as an immortal being. Wasteful and ongoing.

As I sat in Carlisle's office waiting the love of my life motionless and pale, silence consumed my world. Our babies were downstairs with their family. Little Mason and Elizabeth, both strong, both healthy, both human-well from what we can tell.

Downstairs is where there is noise, joyous noise. Here, in this office, is where there is nothing but torturing silence. Waiting for life that may never come.

_10 hours earlier…_

I was downstairs at the time Bella's water broke. I was disgusted by the fact that she had to drink human blood to keep the babies healthy, but I knew it would help her. Alice saw that it would. However, Alice was having trouble seeing Bella's future lately. She thinks it has something to do with the fact that Bella is carrying half-breeds in her womb and Alice has never been half human, half vampire.

I started to make Bella something to eat when I heard her calls.

"Edward!" she yelled, and then it was shortly followed by a little scream.

As fast I could I was at her side, as was the rest of my family. Carlisle rushed back into his office and started to make everything ready for the babies to be born in the house.

"Edward," Bella said through her teeth as she grabbed my hand, "please don't leave me."

I kissed her forehead as I pulled her into my arms to carry her to Carlisle's office. "I would never dream of it love."

"Alice, please call my parents."

Alice nodded and rushed out of the room.

Esme had a face of pure joy. She put her hands over her mouth as she smiled and watched me carry my fiancé down to the office.

My brothers were smiling broadly and giving me two thumbs up.

I just ignored them not wanting to think of what might happen to my love if this does not end well. I shook my head as I walked through the doors of the office. I can't be thinking that way. Not now. I have to be here for her all the way. I have to be strong for her.

As I placed Bella on the bed Carlisle set up, he went to shut the door behind us.

_From what I can see now Edward, Bella will survive,_ Alice's voice said quiet confidently.

Unfortunately, I could find myself to put all my trust in her visions at the moment. I wouldn't even say that to myself for I feared to hope and I don't know what I would do if I hoped too much and things didn't end out they way I planned for them to.

Bella was breathing very hard, out of nervousness I assumed, and her eyes were wide and frightened. Carlisle started to check on her and make sure the babies were okay; setting up a heart monitor across her stomach to make sure the babies hearts were normal.

"Edward," she said softly, "I'm scared."

I smoothed back her hair and kissed her gently on the lips. "Don't worry love. Everything's going to be just fine. You're going to be just fine; Mason and Elizabeth will be just fine too. Don't worry," I whispered. "I won't let anything happen to you."

I felt the weight of that promise as it left my tongue. I knew what I just promised her and she did too. She squeezed my hand a little tighter and shut her eyes.

"I love you," Bella said suddenly.

"I love you more than you can imagine," I promised her.

Carlisle than told us that Bella was only dilated 4 centimeters and that she had to get to ten before she could start to push. He then left the room knowing it will be a little while to give us some privacy.

I kept holding her hand and would occasionally kiss her forehead. We didn't say a lot to each other. I couldn't even find the words to tell her how much she means to me; how I could not and will not live without her.

When her first contraction came, I couldn't stand to see her in pain, but I held her hand and soothed her as she clutched onto my hand. Looking at her than, the color leaving her face, her fragile body collapsing back onto the bed, it was hard to trust Alice's prediction.

Carlisle came back into the room every few hours to check on Bella and the babies. Charlie came in about an hour later and stayed with us for a little over a half an hour, apologizing that he had to go back to work, but Renee is already on a plane to Seattle and he will bring her here as soon as she lands.

Soon after I ended up in bed with Bella, cradling her to my chest as she tried to rest and relax. Every so often she would let out a little whimper of pain, and I wanted so badly to end this for her so that she would be healthy and strong again, but I was too late for that.

Alice came in and stayed with us for a while, trying to talk to Bella about the wedding to distract her from everything else. It worked, in a way, but it only got Bella a little more stressed out and Carlisle actually had to ask Alice to step out.

No one else came up to visit Bella after that for fear that they may stress her out too much where it would harm her or the babies.

About five hours later, Bella was dilated 6 centimeters. Her contractions where coming every couple of minutes causing her to squeeze my hand and shut her eyes tightly, trying to make herself not scream out in pain.

I tried to sooth her, but it was beginning to torture me too much to see her in this much pain. Anytime she would try and shut her eyes to get some rest another contraction would come and she would scrunch up and pull me a little closer to her.

I would rub her back and place a cool washrag on her forehead to cool her down, sometimes I would just place my own hand one her forehead and on her neck to cool her down since my hands were probably colder than the washrag.

Esme turned on the air conditioning and Carlisle turned on the fans in his office to try and keep Bella comfortable, but even then, when the room was ready of polar bears, she was still sweating and moaning from being to hot.

Seven hours into it and Bella was still only 6 centimeters dilated. She groaned in frustration when Carlisle told us. I tried to relax her by telling her what we can be doing in a few days with the twins. Taking them to our meadow, maybe take them to Charlie's to visit with him and Renee, or we could simply stay in the nursery.

She smiled when I mentioned our meadow. "We could take them to a picnic there when they get older," she said softly.

I smiled back and nodded. "You can tell Elizabeth about how you finally saw me for what I truly am in the meadow."

"While you throw a baseball or football with Mason, unless he inherited my athletic abilities than you wouldn't be able to do much with him without him hurting himself or someone else."

I chuckled. "I don't know what we would do if one of the twins inherit that from you. We may have to keep them in a plastic bubble."

"But they will still find love like The Boy in the Plastic Bubble," she said with a small laugh.

"Emmett would probably enjoy that though."

"Or maybe Mason will be really strong and could take Emmett in a wrestling match or something."

"Then Elizabeth would end up like Alice and beg you to take her shopping everyday."

She grimaced. "That's why we'll stay here, so that Alice can do that stuff with her."

I smirked. "Alice would be thrilled. However, if Elizabeth ends up like you with an indifference to the fashions Alice loves, well, Alice may get very upset."

She shrugged. "Well, Elizabeth and I could bond over that when Alice forces us to go shopping with her."

We were silent for a little while, when Bella tensed up as another contraction came. When it ended I hurried up another topic to keep her from worrying all over again. "What do you think the twins will inherit from me?"

She considered it for a minute as she recovered from the pain. "I hope they get your eyes when you were human."

"Green?"

She nodded. "I think they will get you odd color hair too," she said with a small laugh.

I laughed as well.

"I feel like Mason will be the spitting image as you, and maybe one of them will inherit your musical abilities and hopefully the one that inherits my athletic abilities so that they have something to fall back on."

I rolled my eyes, smiling. "Well, I know for one thing they will have to inherit you unconditional understanding."

"Understanding for what?" she asked softly.

"Supernatural beings."

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "Considering what they are they really have no room to judge, now do they?" she said looking down at her stomach. I place my hand on top of it and began tracing circles on it.

"I hope they will be okay."

"They are going to be fine, Bella. Trust me," I whispered into her hair before I kissed the back of her head. "They are going to be healthy and strong and beautiful."

"I hope so," she whispered back, pulling me a little closer to her. I wrapped my arms around her protectively and began to hum her lullaby to her, hoping it would soothe her.

At 3:13 A.M. on May 17 Mason Anthony Cullen was born. He weighed 5lbs, 3oz. He had a little bit of hair and brown eyes, just like his mother. Then at 3:17 A.M on May 17 Elizabeth Alice Cullen was born. She weighed 5lbs, 1oz. She had about the same amount of hair as her brother, but with brilliant greens eyes, like I once had when I was human.

They were both healthy and strong, Elizabeth a little more than her brother, but Mason was able to breath on his own and cried the moment he came into this world. They both had ten little toes and ten little fingers.

They were perfect.

However, Bella collapsed while Elizabeth was coming into this world. The love of my life was barely able to look as her daughter came into Carlisle's hands. Before he was able to take her to table, Bella's vitals were going down and her breathing slowed.

By 3:30 A.M she was stable, but in a comatose state. She was breathing regularly, but her eyes would not open. She stayed unmoving, deathly pale, and fragile.

_I can't see anything Edward,_ Alice's voiced called to me a few hours later. _I don't understand. I can't see if she is going to wake up; I can't see if she doesn't. I just look and there is nothing but a foggy mist clouding my visions._

I have been sitting beside her bed for a few hours now. They twins where both in the room with me, sleeping in their own little bassinet.

Looking at them, one would think they are ordinary human infants, but my family knew different. We still didn't know how they would end up, but for now I was just glad they were alive.

Renee and Charlie came in to visit the twins around eight in the morning and they both sat with Bella. I knew they wanted to see her along, but I just couldn't leave her. I promised her I wouldn't leave her. So I 'slept' when they came into the room, like I did when Bella was in the hospital after James attacked her last year.

My family came in to see the twins and Bella every few hours. They would sit with us and try to distract me from everything going on. Rosalie's face lit up the moment she saw Mason and Elizabeth. She took Mason into her arms first and sat with him in the rocking chair Esme brought into the office for me.

They all took turns holding the twins, all in awe of the little miracles Bella and I had. Esme was speechless thinking that she would get to be a grandmother, and Rosalie and Alice were so happy to be aunts. Emmett and Jasper handled them with a lot of care, but both looked a little awkward holding them.

Then finally they both came back to me and I rocked them back and forth as my family just sat and watched everything going on in the room. When Carlisle came in after work his thoughts were running in a stream to me.

_Her vitals are stable Edward. She is breathing regularly and so doesn't seem to be doing any worse. I can't see why she is not awake yet._

He stopped for a moment and looked at me directly. The whole room then understood what was going on. _I'm not sure if now is the time, son. I can't tell you if she is going to wake up or remain in this state for a while. Wait for a week or at least a few days before you make up her mind. I would hate to see you change her when you know she could have remained human._

I gave him a curtly nod, as my eyes remained on my children. Shortly after they all understood that I just wanted to be alone with my fiancé and children.

If I changed her now, she may have to stay away from the twins for a few years before she would be able to resist their blood, and even then it won't be completely safe for them because she would still be such a new vampire. And even Jasper, who is older than me, has trouble resisting blood-as we know.

I couldn't take her away from her children before she even got to know them. And depending on how long we would have to be gone, the children would have no idea who we were. We couldn't miss them growing up, taking their first steps, learning their first words. Bella would hate to miss that.

I stood up and put the twins back into their bassinets and walked over to the bed. I placed my hand on top of hers and sank into the chair beside the bed. I head fell onto the bed and I shut my eyes tightly wishing this were just a nightmare. But I knew that was impossible considering I cannot sleep.

What am I going to do?

I stayed like that for the rest of the day and the next. By May 20th nothing changed. The twins were getting bigger slowly and they were awake more in the day. They cried every so often, but thankfully Rosalie and Esme helped out all the time with them.

I was with Bella every second of the day, I couldn't even remember the last time I was out of Carlisle office. It might be have been before the twins were born. The days passed slowly. I would watch the sun rise and fall and Bella would remain the same.

In a moment of weakness I almost changed her right then and there, but I remembered Carlisle asking me to wait a week.

Bella's parents returned and by now Phil, Renee's husband, joined them. They visited every day, sometimes twice a day, and each time they came I would pretend to be asleep, or I would stare out the window during their visit refusing to leave Bella.

The next day I was sitting in the rocking chair, holding Elizabeth as Mason slept right next to us. My left hand was holding Bella's as I stared into our daughter's eyes, trying to find an answer. Then suddenly I felt pressure on my hand.

I looked as Bella's eyes fluttered open.

* * *

A/N: Bet you didn't see that one coming. I'm trying to not make this like the fourth book, and as you can already see, it's nothing like that. The twins won't be growing up at an unnatural pace, and Bella's not going to die giving birth to them! Crazy! Hope you liked it!


	14. Dear Readers Again

Author's Note:

Okay! I wrote a new story. Sorry for those who wanted this finished, you didn't express your opinion strong enough. So the story is called The Night Will Go On As Follow. I know it's a mouthful, but it's the title to one of my favorite songs. Anyways I hope you read my new story, and enjoy it. Being on break I hope to crank out chapter faster than I have before.

Thank you for remaining faithful and putting up with me when I disappear.

~AlwaysAndForever13


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